Category: Horoscopes

All quotes are from One Man’s Meat, by E.B. White, born July 11, 1899.

Cancer (June 21 – July 22) My goal is no longer a three-hundred-egg hen but to find peace through conversion of my table scraps into humus. It’s good to have goals.

Leo (July 23 – Aug. 22) I have just got hold of a book called Bio-Dynamic Farming and Gardening by Ehrenfried Pfeiffer, which bids fair to shape my mystical course from now on. … The hero of the book is the common earthworm. You’ve got some good reading in store.

Virgo (Aug. 23 – Sept. 22) The possession of a dog today is a different thing from the possession of a dog at the turn of the century, when one’s dog was fed on mashed potato and brown gravy and lived in a doghouse with an arched portal. Today a dog is fed on scraped beef and Vitamin B1 and lives in bed with you. It’s time to update the update.

Libra (Sept. 23 – Oct. 22) As for me, although I am motorized to a degree, I enjoy living among pedestrians who have an instinctive and habitual realization that there is more to a journey than the mere fact of arrival. So much more.

Scorpio (Oct. 23 – Nov. 21) I had expected to see more of the Fair than usual this year, because I had some sheep entered, and had to be around to tend them. But I found that I saw less, rather than more, because of being there in a responsible capacity instead of carefree. Work is work.

Sagittarius (Nov. 22 – Dec. 21) The farm as a way of life has been subordinated to the farm as a device for making money. Somewhere … in the process of introducing vitamins and electric time-switches into his henhouse the farmer has missed the point of the egg…. The chicken knows.

Capricorn (Dec. 22 – Jan. 19) Anything can happen at a county agricultural fair. … To the fair come the man and his cow, the boy and his girl, the wife and her green tomato pickle, each anticipating victory and the excitement of being separated from his money by familiar devices. Your green tomato pickle is on the road to victory.

Aquarius (Jan. 20 – Feb. 18) The lake had never been what you would call a wild lake. Even the tamest lake has a wild side.

Pisces (Feb. 19 – March 20) This month … I am going to get a cow. Perhaps I should put it the other way round — a cow is going to get me. It should be mutual.

Aries (March 21 – April 19) This morning made preparations for building a boat — the first boat I ever prepared to build. Bought ten cents’ worth of wicking and borrowed some caulking tools, and prepared myself further by asking a man how to build a boat and he told me. Now ask another one and compare.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20) The sum of ninety cents seems a lot to spend for anything, no matter what. But when I get up into gustier amounts, among sums like fifty dollars, or a hundred and thirty-two dollars, or three hundred and seven dollars, they all sound pretty much alike. “Out of your league” is a big category but so is your league.

Gemini (May 21 – June 20) Some people can look at the notation 5/23/29 and it means something to them, calls up some sort of image. I can’t do that. I can see lust in a pig’s eye, but I can’t see a day in a number. There’s a whole day in a pig’s eye.

All quotes are from Mrs. Pollifax Pursued, by Dorothy Gilman, born June 25, 1923.

Gemini (May 21 – June 20) Once ensconced in the kitchen Mrs. Pollifax pursued her inquiries as tactfully as possible. Breaking eggs into a bowl and whipping them she asked, ‘Were you followed out of New York City on Monday, or did this happen after you reached Connecticut?’ Tactful inquiries are the best inquiries.

Cancer (June 21 – July 22) If his situation intrigued Mrs. Pollifax, his importance did not, since planting basil in her greenhouse was the more vital to her this morning. Planting basil is always more important.

Leo (July 23 – Aug. 22) The salami, however, was not in the refrigerator. This seemed odd, since she had made a sandwich of it scarcely an hour ago; nevertheless the salami was not where it should have been in the refrigerator, nor was it on the counter or the kitchen table. When someone moves your salami, make lemonade.

Virgo (Aug. 23 – Sept. 22) Carefully she took stock of her resources: a flashlight for dark closets, the poker from the fireplace, and her training in karate. Take stock and replenish your resources.

Libra (Sept. 23 – Oct. 22) The inquiry did not take days, however; by early evening Bishop was in his office beaming triumphantly. ‘Got it! Thank God for computers, Paris has found the needle in the haystack for you.’ A big haystack needs a big computer.

Scorpio (Oct. 23 – Nov. 21) ‘Sardines!’ cried Mrs. Pollifax suddenly as they headed north on I-95, still followed by the green sedan. But no anchovies.

Sagittarius (Nov. 22 – Dec. 21) It was only Carstairs, thought Mrs. Pollifax, who had been intuitive enough to weave together dissimilar and fragile threads to make a whole out of a crazy, outrageous pattern, and she marveled at him again. An intuitive friend can be marvelous.

Capricorn (Dec. 22 – Jan. 19) At the Department people did not ask unnecessary questions. Bishop merely said, ‘Where are you at this precise moment, Mrs. P.?’ Don’t ask unnecessary questions.

Aquarius (Jan. 20 – Feb. 18) Frowning, he leaned back in his chair and attempted an emptying of his mind, hoping the answer might spring from his subconscious as so frequently happened; in fact he sometimes found his subconscious more reliable than Bishop’s memos as he juggled three and four projects at a time. Take a moment to forget the memos.

Pisces (Feb. 19 – March 20) After all, it had proven a rather dull winter, and a girl in trouble appealed far more to her sense of adventure than a Garden Club meeting. Hey, even a garden club meeting can be an adventure.

Aries (March 21 – April 19) Carstairs … placed the package to one side with his other paperwork, at which point Bishop said tactfully, ‘They want it today.’ Carstairs groaned. ‘Then preserve my sanity by bringing me a fresh cup of coffee, will you?’ And water. Don’t dehydrate.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20) ‘My friend,’ said Bernard, ‘I do not like to be overly suspicious but I would take a close look at whatever company your American businessman represents, which is—?’ ‘A holding company,’ said Carstairs. ‘Ah, yes, my friend, but does one know what it “holds”?’ Fancy jargon will not throw you off.

All quotes are from Gentleman’s Agreement, by Laura Z. Hobson, born June 19, 1900.

Gemini (May 21 – June 20) So often getting to know a new man was a disheartening business of revising downward from the first impression. Expectations may need revising.

Cancer (June 21 – July 22) Two o’clock in the morning was a hell of a time to remember Pop and his large-scale talk about ethics. The mind was never a respecter of appropriateness. What you want and what’s appropriate may diverge.

Leo (July 23 – Aug. 22) Phil folded the paper, creasing it lengthwise and then across as if he were wedged in by a subway mob. But it was time he needed, not space. He might have known this would happen and thought out in advance what to do. There’s no such thing as planning behind.

Virgo (Aug. 23 – Sept. 22) Philip Green nodded, not in agreement with the comfortable words, but in affirmation of his own estimate of the job ahead. It would be flabby, lifeless, unless he found some special approach to it. Instinct, experience, past failures as well as past successes, all helped him now in his quick appraisal. You’ll find the right approach.

Libra (Sept. 23 – Oct. 22) ‘Committees.’ The certainty of future boredom, of wasted listening, laced his depression with resentment. Get out while you can.

Scorpio (Oct. 23 – Nov. 21) The editor told him where, and they shook hands with a touch of formality, as if each suddenly remembered he didn’t know the other well. You can strengthen old relationships and make new ones at the same time.

Sagittarius (Nov. 22 – Dec. 21) Soon he was striding along as if he were hurrying to a specific place at a specific time. Actually he was walking only so that he could think more rapidly about the new assignment. … His mind … darted in new directions, hunting possibilities, exploring, rejecting. You’re just full of ideas this week.

Capricorn (Dec. 22 – Jan. 19) The shyness of the outsider came over him. … Working at home was the setup he’d asked for, but it would be wise, now that he was on the staff, to come in every day until he got to know some of these editors and writers. At once the idea disturbed him. Socialize at your own pace.

Aquarius (Jan. 20 – Feb. 18) In the two weeks since he’d become a resident of New York, he had passed the stage where he had to watch two successive street signs to see whether he was headed uptown or down. Get to know your surroundings.

Pisces (Feb. 19 – March 20) He wandered about the wide, tall-ceilinged room in which their own furniture and books looked so different from the way they had in the house in California. When the extra bookshelves were built in and the rest of his books taken out of the stacked cartons, it would be a pleasant room; he would like working in it. A little interior design could work wonders.

Aries (March 21 – April 19) At his desk, he had ordered himself to think about the assignment, but like a fractious child, his mind had refused to comply. Try clearing your head between assignments.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20) On assignment, he was never shy about meeting and interviewing people, but to make new social contacts was another thing. Your skills may vary with the context, but you still have skills.