Author: Amy Diaz

Shazam! Fury of the Gods (PG-13)

Billy Batson is trying to keep the Shazam team together even though his family of superhero kids is growing up in Shazam! Fury of the Gods.

Actually, I lie, the movie isn’t about that at all. It states that a few times as Billy’s (Asher Angel as the teen, Zachary Levi as the Shazam superhero he can turn himself in to) current concern, with him insisting that all his siblings and fellow superheroes attend all rescues and family meetings together. But the movie doesn’t really seem to know how to make his desire to hold his new family together part of the story, either plot-wise or emotionally, in any kind of an organic way. Mary (Grace Caroline Currey, in both her incarnations) has in fact aged out of the foster care system but continues to live with parents Rosa (Marta Milans) and Victor (Cooper Andrews) and works between super-suiting up to contribute money to the household. Billy is himself only a few months away from turning 18, as is his bestie Freddy (Jack Dylan Grazer/Adam Brody), who occasionally superheroes alone and is trying to impress new girl Ann (Rachel Zegler) at school. Younger kids/Shazam team members Pedro (Jovan Armand/D.J. Cotrona), Eugene (Ian Chen/Ross Butler) and Darla (Faithe Herman/Meagan Good) are, uhm, also there. I feel like there was a plan for them to have story lines but it doesn’t really pan out.

Meanwhile, Greek goddesses, the Daughters of Atlas (who sound like a pretty good all-lady metal cover band) — Hespera (Helen Mirren) and Kalypso (Lucy Liu) — retrieve the staff that the movie thankfully reminds us that Shazam broke in the first movie. As it turns out, breaking the staff actually broke the barrier between the worlds of the gods and humans. (Wizard Djimon Hounsou had domed the gods off in a floating bubble or something — look, all the lore stuff in this movie presented dumbly and I’m not going to worry about it too much). So these ladies, dressed in full Greek warrior garb, go retrieve the staff and force the Wizard to put it back together and then head to the human realm to find and take their power back from Shazam(s).

Eventually, there’s a dragon, a giant tree that creates serious root-based damage to the Phillies’ Citizens Bank Park, and winged lions and cyclops causing havoc in the streets of Philadelphia. And, hoo-boy, is it all boring. Let me say that again: Helen Mirren is a god (typecasting) and Lucy Liu rides a dragon to fight Shazam — and this movie could not figure out how to make any of that interesting, even in a campy way.

Every dumb bit of DC Extended Universe business was a drag on the movie (there are apparently two credits scenes, I stayed for one and I don’t regret leaving before the other). There is an absolutely baffling cameo at the end of the movie that is so ham-fisted it made me mad about a character I have previously liked. The movie cares way too much about the minutiae of the backstory of Daughters of Atlas without ever bothering to make the characters of Hespera, Kalypso and mystery sister No. 3 (not really a mystery) interesting. There are a lot of things that are started, little story elements that seem like they’re going to add emotional heft to the movie, that are just dropped like they were forgotten about. The movie feels senselessly loud — not just in volume but in how everything feels three times too much as if to distract us from how nothing it is. It is brightly colored scarves thrown all over the living room in hopes you won’t notice there’s no furniture or carpet or TV.

The only time this movie shows any bit of charm is when the family — specifically, with the kids in their child versions, sometimes with the parents — is together. (In general, this movie does not have a good balance of the kids and their adult superhero avatars.) I think the heart of this superhero character and his story comes back to his family, specifically his family of people who have ultimately chosen to be each other’s family. Their kindness and empathy and decision to trust and love each other after whatever traumas and losses they previously faced are the superpowers of this group, and the first Shazam! did a good job of making that an organic element of the story. This movie seems to forget that completely, which is perhaps why most of it feels so hollow despite being so packed with superhero-movie bloat.

Shazam! Fury of the Gods feels like an inferior product whose only selling point is familiar packaging rather than a story with characters we know and care about. C-

Rated PG-13 for sequences of action and violence, and language, according to the MPA on filmratings.com. Directed by David F. Sandberg and written by Henry Gayden and Chris Morgan, Shazam! Fury of the Gods is two hours and 10 minutes long and is distributed in theaters by New Line Cinema.

Featured photo: Shazam! Fury of the Gods.

Scream VI (R)

Another sequel, another spate of Ghostface killings in Scream VI — or, wait, is it a franchise now?

After all, as Mindy (Jasmin Savoy Brown), one of the Core Four (as they extremely reluctantly call themselves) next-generation survivors from the last movie (the 2022 installment, the fifth Scream, called just Scream), says, the rules for a franchise are different. Legacy characters like Gale Weathers (Courtney Cox) can die. Main characters like Sam (Melissa Barrera), last movie’s lead girl and daughter of OG Ghostface Billy Loomis, and her younger sister Tara (Jenna Ortega) also can die — or be the new killer. They killed Luke Skywalker and Tony Stark, Mindy explains; franchises can do anything.

Scream VI takes the action out of Woodsboro and to New York City, where Sam and Tara and Mindy and her brother Chad (Mason Gooding) have all moved to try to put the past behind them but still stick together. They are all dealing, sorta: Tara is going to frat parties and making bad choices, Chad is slow to act on his feelings for Tara, Mindy is hanging close in part because what are the chances lightning (i.e. a serial killer) will strike twice (heh), and Sam is attempting therapy, in part because the narrative about Sam has shifted. The internet has decided that she is the secret true killer, not her boyfriend and his secret girlfriend, whom (the internet says) she framed. So sometimes strangers throw drinks on her and call her a killer while filming her reaction — a particularly disturbing turn of events because Sam does wonder if some part of her does have her father’s stabby inclinations.

Right away, the killings start — actually, as Mindy predicts, the movie goes bigger and actually starts with two Ghostface killings, rather cleverly setting up the movie’s whole vibe of being not just self-referential in its dialog but structurally meta too. And intentionally, I think, the movie pretty quickly lays out the best suspects for the murders, subverts your expectations a little but then steers right back onto the path you suspected from the start. And it works? There’s something sort of cute about how it plays with and fulfills your expectations at the same time. It’s, I dunno, fun in a way that keeps this movie, so so deep into its lore, so full of characters I do not remember at all (did you remember Hayden Panettiere was in this series? because I did not), unexpectedly lively. The new characters are fun, the old characters are fun. This is a solid cast that seems to understand what’s being asked of them and are able to (mostly) keep their characters just interesting enough to get me moderately invested in them. (As to the “mostly,” the movie itself points out that you’ve gotta fill out the cast with some redshirts.)

While I didn’t find most of the movie particularly scary or horrifying (it is not quite Cocaine Bear goofy in its gore but it’s also not entirely not that), there were a few legitimately unsettling moments, usually tapping into some non-horror-specific fears about whom in your life you can trust and some nice “everybody looks like a serial killer on this subway” shots (it’s Halloween in the movie so there are legitimately multiple civilians dressed as horror movie villains but also that kind of paranoia is well conveyed).

Scream VI is, ultimately, fine — which was more than I was expecting and just enough to make me like it more than not. B-

Rated R for strong bloody violence and language throughout, and brief drug use, according to the MPA on filmratings.com. Directed by Matt Bettinelli-Olpin and Tyler Gillett and written by James Vanderbilt & Guy Busick, Scream VI is two hours and three minutes long and distributed in theaters by Paramount Pictures.

65 (PG-13)

Adam Driver reminds you that he can do action movies with 65, a non-Jurassic Park franchise film that allows for fighting dinosaurs.

It’s been a minute since Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker (2019) and he’s done more prestige-y stuff since then, so walking around in a chest-hugging shirt wielding a big sci-fi gun while uttering a minor amount of dialogue is probably good, career-wise, just to keep his hand in.

Mills (Driver) is the captain of a science space vessel transporting a bunch of people in cryo-sleep. The trip is going to take him two years, two years when he’ll be away from his wife (Nika King) and his young daughter Nevine (Chloe Coleman). This makes him sad but, as his wife reminds him, the trip significantly boosts his pay, giving the family the means to pay for Nevine’s medical treatment.

So, you know, paying for health care is a bummer everywhere, even a long time ago on a planet far far away, because, as we’re quickly told, we’re 65 million years ago and Mills and his family live on another planet.

Mid voyage, Mills’ ship runs into an unexpected asteroid field and is badly damaged. It crashes onto an unknown planet, with the cryo pods being flung this way and that. At first it appears that all the passengers have died, but then Mills discovers that one pod, carrying a young girl named Koa (Ariana Greenblatt), is still intact and he takes her out of cryo sleep. He searches for the escape pod that will take them off the planet to where they can be rescued. It is about 13 kilometers away, which doesn’t sound so bad on this planet with breathable air and potable water except that Mills quickly realizes it is also chock full of giant bugs and even gianter people-eating dinosaurs. And there is a ticking clock on this endeavor; it seems that a catastrophically large asteroid from the field his ship flew through is headed to the planet.

Because — dun dun DUN — Mills is on Earth! Right before the dinosaurs are about to have a Very! Bad! Day!

This is maybe a mild spoiler; though I felt like the movie make most of this pretty clear pretty fast. There was something about this very blunt setup and the surface-level bleakness of the characters that made me worry initially that this movie would be very slow going with very little in the way of stakes. And while it did feel this way a little bit in the beginning, I did find myself interested enough in these two characters and in Adam Driver’s overall performance. Koa and Mills don’t speak each other’s language, which helps keep the cutesiness to a tolerable level. The movie uses very simple scenes and moments between them to build their makeshift parent-child relationship and I believed it enough. And Driver is compelling; I mean he brought something to Darth Sulkypants in the last Star Wars trilogy and he is able to make even the goofiness of House of Gucci watchable.

65 isn’t particularly deep or innovative in its Man vs. Dino interactions but it is a solid enough bit of action. B-

Rated PG-13 for intense sci-fi action and peril, and brief bloody images, according to the MPA on filmratings.com. Written and directed by Scott Beck & Bryan Woods, 65 is an hour and 33 minutes long and is distributed in theaters by Columbia Pictures.

Featured photo: Creed 3.

Creed III (PG-13)

Adonis Creed fights childhood trauma in Creed III, a thoroughly engaging entry in the Creed offshoot of the Rockyverse.

After finally beating Ricky Conlan (Tony Bellew), his opponent from the first movie, Adonis “Donnie” Creed (Michael B. Jordan) retires from boxing and lives a happily family-centered life in Los Angeles. He spends time at his gym building up the next generation of boxers and takes care of his elementary-school-age daughter Amara (Mila Davis-Kent), including dressing up as a dragon or something for a tea party while wife Bianca (Tessa Thompson) is working on the music she writes and produces. He seems content — until childhood friend Damian “Dame” Anderson (Jonathan Majors) comes to visit him. Dame has been in prison for nearly two decades but before that he and Donnie were as tight as brothers when they lived in a foster care group home together. They still hung out after Apollo Creed’s widow, Mary-Anne (Phylicia Rashad), adopted Donnie, though apparently she didn’t think much of the friendship since we see a young Donnie (Thaddeus J. Mixson) sneaking out to hang out with young Dame (Spence Moore II), who at the time is a promising young boxer.

In the present, Dame’s presence pushes Donnie back into the headspace of his younger self, remembering the physical abuse he suffered at the group home and the incident that led to Dame’s incarceration. When Dame, who is older than Donnie, tells him he wants to get back to boxing, Donnie knows it’s a bad idea but he reluctantly helps his friend get a fight, out of guilt and obligation. As everyone around Donnie realizes faster than Donnie does, Dame isn’t just trying to recapture past glory; he has some serious grudges to work out.

The beats of this movie are all pretty much what you expect them to be. And there aren’t a lot of surprises in the arcs of the characters either. But everybody here — Jordan, Thompson, the suddenly everywhere Majors — is so compelling, so engaging to watch even when they’re working with some fairly familiar material, that I was pulled in even if this movie doesn’t have the spark of the first Creed. (And while this movie is plenty warm-hearted, I missed the squishy bear hug that Sylvester Stallone’s Rocky brought to these movies.) Nevertheless, I was in and I enjoyed this movie that is a smarter, well-finessed version of the boxing movie standard. B

Rated PG-13 for intense sports action, violence and some strong language, according to the MPA on filmratings.com. Directed by Michael B. Jordan with a screenplay by Keenan Coogler & Zach Baylin, Creed III is an hour and 56 minutes long and distributed in theaters by Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer Pictures.

Operation Fortune: Ruse de Guerre (R)

Jason Statham does a goofy riff on James Bond-ish spy adventure with the Guy Ritchie-directed and co-written Operation Fortune: Ruse de Guerre, a movie that really feels like someone’s hoping to make it a part 1.

And I feel like, were this on Netflix and available for watching while you sipped your cocktail of choice and dozed on the sofa some Friday night after a long week, it would be a perfect part 1 for a perfectly moderately entertaining series.

Orson Fortune (Statham), a contract government spying-and-stuff type, is charged by his handler Nathan (Cary Elwes), who has been charged by British government official Knighton (Eddie Marsan, doing quality “exasperated”), to find a thing. What thing? It’s called “The Handle” and nobody knows what it is or what it does but it was stolen from a lab, it’s being sold by arms dealer Greg Simmonds (a delightfully sleazy Hugh Grant) and all the wrong sorts of people want it. So Nathan and his team of Orson, Sarah (Aubrey Plaza) and JJ (Bugzy Malone) have to get it back before any of the bad people get it. Unfortunately, someone has clearly tasked a competing team led by Mike (Peter Ferdinando) to do the same, so the two teams — who have professional rivalries with each other — are constantly getting tangled in each other’s operations.

Eventually, the Nathan-Orson team lands on a means of getting close to Greg Simmonds that involves enlisting the help of/blackmailing into service Greg’s favorite actor, Danny Francesco (Josh Hartnett). The gang jumps around Europe, to Los Angeles and eventually to Turkey, pulling off assorted capers along the way to try to track down The Handle, which is such a McGuffin that I was a little disappointed when we actually learned what it is.

There are several more characters — a house full of shady types, a pair of sketchy tech types, an assortment of henchmen and women — I haven’t mentioned yet, the tonnage of which also gives the movie a feel of a two-episode pilot packed full of the characters we’ll bump into throughout the season. It also means that no one character, not the actor-y Danny or hacker Sarah or tough guy Orson (who has this whole character thing about liking fancy wine that just never really goes anywhere), gets time to really develop. Operation Fortune stuffs in a whole lot of a whole lot — fights, chases, Aubrey Plaza wackiness that feels a bit like her Parks and Recreation character doing a computer hacker a la Janet Snakehole — into its not-quite two-hour run time and yet it feels more like it’s stocking up on plot business than telling a complex story. I often felt like somehow in all this too much, there was not enough — not enough choreographed-action wows or sparky intra-character chemistry or general funness. Some of the action even hit that spot of movie white noise, where I felt myself having to work extra hard to stay awake — not a fatal flaw for a movie you watch on your couch where you can rewind but not ideal for a movie you put on hard pants to see. B-

Rated R for language and violence, according to the MPA on filmratings.com. Directed by Guy Ritchie with a screenplay by Guy Ritchie and Ivan Atkinson & Marn Davies, Operation Fortune: Ruse de Guerre is an hour and 54 minutes long and distributed in theaters by Lionsgate.

Featured photo: Creed 3.

A bear does cocaine in Cocaine Bear, a movie that is 100 percent exactly what you think it’s going to be.

This movie opens with title cards giving us facts about black bears citing Wikipedia as its source, which feels tonally perfect. Like, here’s some information but we didn’t work super hard to get it and we don’t stand by its accuracy. (But, speaking of Wikipedia, a link on this movie’s Wikipedia page will take you to the tale of the “real life” Cocaine Bear, who has apparently been stuffed and is now on display at something called the “Kentucky for Kentucky Fun Mall” and also the bear’s nickname is sometimes “Pablo Eskobear” and, well, I definitely recommend the “Cocaine Bear” Wikipedia page.) This movie is directed by Elizabeth Banks and if you can picture her seriously reading you facts about bears, that gives you a sense of where this movie is, vibe-wise, even though she herself doesn’t appear in the movie.

It’s the “this is your brain on drugs” 1980s and a drug smuggler dumps duffel bags filled with cocaine out of an airplane and into a Georgia forest before jumping himself. Well, before preparing to jump himself. Before he can actually jump, he bonks his head, falls out of the plane and ends up splatting in someone’s yard. But the gang expecting the cocaine — led by Syd (Ray Liotta, in his final role, according to IMDb) — knows that most of it is still out there and needs to go collect it so as not to incur the wrath of the cartel wholesaling it to them. Syd sends his son, Eddie (Alden Ehrenreich), who is still grieving the loss of his wife and is generally disinterested in his dad’s whole drug-dealing thing, and Daveed (O’Shea Jackson Jr.), a friend to Eddie but also no-nonsense in his approach to the cocaine retrieval, to find the missing drugs.

Bob (Isiah Whitlock Jr.), nominally a detective but primarily an Isiah Whitlock character, suspects that Syd’s gang might be looking for the cocaine and goes on the hunt for it in hopes of nabbing them.

Before those opposing forces can get to the drugs, though, a trio of crime-minded dummies — whose IMDb names are “Kid (Stache)” (Aaron Holliday), “Vest” (J. B. Moore) and “Ponytail” (Leo Hanna) — find one of the duffels and hides it in the forest, hoping to go back for it later.

But before any of these guys start their cocaine search, a large female black bear finds some of the cocaine, consumes it and decides she loves cocaine. She is single-minded on getting more cocaine — possibly grunting something like “yum yum” when she’s near it? maybe that was my imagination. And while not usually portrayed this way, cocaine seems to give her the munchies, specifically for humans, the more clueless the better.

This is bad news not just for the cops and criminals on the search for the drugs but also for anybody who happens to be in the woods, like for example single mother Sari (Keri Russell), searching for her tween-ish-aged daughter Dee Dee (Brooklynn Prince) and Dee Dee’s buddy Henry (Christian Convery), who have cut school to go to the forest in search of a waterfall. And forest ranger Liz (Margo Martindale), who is far more concerned with seducing wildlife expert Peter (Jesse Tyler Ferguson).

Everybody, every Margo Martindale and Keri Russell and Ray Liotta body, seems to be having a total blast here — and why not. The movie is called Cocaine Bear and the coked up bear quickly overtakes all other storylines and character elements as being the key issue of the movie. This is not a horror movie, this isn’t even a thriller really, it’s just a bear, on cocaine, chasing O’Shea Jackson Jr., who like his dad (Ice Cube) is solid at being the straight man in a wacky situation. What’s not to enjoy? The movie — like this year’s Plane or last year’s Beast — is totally and completely up front about what it is going to deliver to you and then it delivers exactly that. What are this movie’s themes? Bear on cocaine. What is this movie’s central argument? That a bear on cocaine will want more cocaine. What does this movie make you feel? That you are watching a bear on cocaine — or, you know, a good-enough rendering of a bear. This movie does have some gore, which feels more for the comic “ew” of it all than to really induce fear. There is a “glued on mustache” sensibility that pervades this movie, which perhaps keeps it from reaching some, I don’t know, higher height of intoxicated bear cinema but also keeps things humming along at a nicely unserious, deliberately shabby level. Which is all to say, if Cocaine Bear seems both really stupid and like something you, with your daily stresses and worries, might need in your life, you are absolutely correct. B

Rated R for bloody violence and gore, drug content and language throughout, according to the MPA on filmratings.com. Directed by Elizabeth Banks and written by Jimmy Warden, Cocaine Bear is an hour and 35 minutes long and is distributed in theaters by Universal Studios.

Featured photo: Cocaine Bear.