Granite State native publishes tongue-in-cheek book
By Michael Witthaus
mwitthaus@hippopress.com
Microplastics Are Your Friends! is a new book that at first glance looks aimed at younger readers, but it decidedly is not children’s literature. Playfully illustrated, the colorful 30-pager is subversively hilarious as it depicts what might happen if the people behind a really bad idea tried to sell it as something to celebrate.
The central premise, delivered by a white-haired narrator named Professor McTegan, who looks a lot like Doc from Back to the Future, is that while microplastics contribute to all manner of maladies, they serve a higher purpose. Each teaspoon of deadly pixie dust in our brains is the only defense against a race of human-hunting demons called The Shalhoub.
Standing up to these “vicious hell beasts that will not rest until we’re completely eradicated from this mortal coil” is worth the cost of things like dementia and low fertility rates. Besides, forgetting the present to reminisce about the past is a good thing, right? And, the Professor adds, “look at our friends, solving the overpopulation problem for us!”
Prof. McTegan’s “odyssey of discovery as he explores the benefits of having microscopic bits of plastic inside you” came from the imagination of Mister Shushy, the nom de plume of a former standup comedian. He began with the idea of RFK Jr., or someone similar, deciding to sell microplastics as a positive and commission a children’s book.
“It is the kind of off-the-wall weirdo humor that I like,” he said by phone recently. His Mister Shushy’s Nightmare Box Substack contains examples of this, like Ask Cherk, an advice column run by an oversexed “debonair alien gonzo journalist” as well as the too-close-to-the-truth short story Flow Ryda Man, which includes equally funny context.
While he was a comic, the author appeared at the Shaskeen’s Wednesday night event and also ran a regular showcase at the Dover Brickhouse for “the majority of its lifespan,” he said. Despite successes like opening for Frank Santorelli, Mike Racine and others, however, he decided to leave. It turned out to be decent timing.
“I quit stand-up in, like, 2019, and then the pandemic happened,” he said. His day job also contributed to the decision. “I’m talking on the phone to people all day, and it’s mentally exhausting…. I didn’t have the mental energy to do that for eight or nine hours and then go out and do open mics.”
Zoom shows held no appeal, so he laid low for the next five years, but the November election changed that.
“Something snapped in me,” he said. “It was, like, I need a creative outlet, I need to not be just doomscrolling. It’s easy to be sick to your stomach and depressed if you’re just looking into this little infinite box in your pocket. So I started writing.”
The name of the demonic race to whom microplastics are Kryptonite was inspired by Dune, but the actor famous for Monk and The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel is there intentionally, and not altogether flatteringly. Don’t take it the wrong way, though.
“It’s a deep abiding love for Tony Shalhoub that he’s included in the book,” the author said.
While he works to get Microplastics Are Your Friends! into bookstores, the easiest way to read it is on a Kindle. For those who want a physical book, it can be ordered at Gibson’s in Concord and Manchester’s Bookery. He’s also working to get it into Eight Legged Octopus in Dover, Water Street Bookstore in Exeter and Jetpack Comics in Rochester.
It’s stocked in a store in the Massachusetts town the author now calls home, with a fun touch — in the nonfiction section. “Somebody has a great sense of humor,” a delighted Mister Shushy said, adding that while it’s technically a kids’ book, the real audience should be obvious.
“Sorry in advance if you’re upset,” he writes in an opening disclaimer. “But also, like, you saw a book with the title Microplastics Are Your Friends! and still bought it for your child, so hopefully this ends up being a teachable moment for you.”
Microplastics Are Your Friends! by Mister Shushy, Illustrated by Lucas D
Available on Amazon Kindle. Physical copies can be ordered at independent bookstores like Gibson’s in Concord and Bookery in Manchester. Works by Mister Shushy are compiled on mistershushy.substack.com. Follow him on Instagram @mistershushy.
