Time to get chickens?

The basics on adding hens, chicks and roosters to your backyard farm

Perhaps the fluctuations in egg prices have you considering getting your own flock of egg-laying chickens. A New York Times story from Feb. 2 about the “inflation chicken” trend points out that there is a hefty upfront cost to raising chickens — the cost of the birds, the cost of the coops. But if you are thinking about adding chickens to your spring and summer gardening plans, here’s what you can expect in terms of chores, costs and eggs.

2 black and white speckled chickens behind chicken wire
Barred rock chicken. Photo courtesy of UNH Cooperative Extension.

What are the regulations for raising backyard chickens in New Hampshire?

New Hampshire does not mandate statewide regulations for keeping chickens for personal use. Rather, regulations are set by municipalities and vary by town or city.

“Most towns and even cities are very chicken-friendly,” said Christine Templeton, who co-owns Templeton Family Organics farm in Goffstown with her husband, Brian Templeton.

Residents may be subject to zoning ordinances and land use laws that dictate zones in which backyard chickens are and are not permitted; the minimum acreage or lot size required; the distance maintained between chickens and neighboring residences and roads; the number of chickens allowed to be kept (which may be relative to the acreage or lot size); and rules regarding roosters.

“Some towns regulate roosters — limit the numbers or do not allow them — in residential areas,” said Mary Davis, UNH Cooperative Extension Field Specialist and New Hampshire State 4-H Animal Science program manager. “There are fewer regulations in more rural areas and areas zoned residential.”

“It is the responsibility of the chicken owner to check if roosters are allowed or not,” added Kendall Kunelius, UNH Cooperative Extension Field Specialist in Agricultural Business Management. “I always recommend checking with the town before considering purchases of any animal.”

What types of chickens do well in New Hampshire? How do I decide what type(s) of chickens to get?

There are many different breeds of chickens to consider; New Hampshire chicken experts mentioned Golden Comet, Barred Rock, Rhode Island Red, New Hampshire Red, Speckled Sussex, Australorps, Leghorn, Buff Orpington, Araucana, Easter Eggers and Wyandottes as some of the most commonly kept breeds in the Northeast.

2 white and brown spotted chickens standing outside in grass
Mixed breed chickens, often called a “barnyard mix.” Photo courtesy of UNH Cooperative Extension.

The best type of chicken for you depends on your goals.

“Why do you want chickens?” Davis said. “For the fresh eggs? For locally raised meat? Any breed of hen will lay eggs, but the popular egg-laying breeds have been selectively bred to produce more eggs per year, and ‘meat breeds’ are bred to have larger breast muscles, be bigger and yield more meat.”

New Hampshire Red, Rhode Island Red, Barred Rock and Golden Comet chickens are reliable egg-layers and tolerant to the cold, making them popular picks among New Hampshire chicken owners. Other breeds might be chosen for their more specialized egg-laying qualities.

“There’s a lot of variety among breeds bred for egg production,” said Carl Majewski, UNH Cooperative Extension Field Specialist in Dairy, Livestock, and Forage Crops, “from the modern Leghorn breeds used for commercial production, to older ‘heritage’ breeds dating back to the 1800s or so, to oddball breeds that lay different colors of eggs — anything from blue to green to chocolate brown — or have striking plumage.”

“People need to decide what is most important to them, such as high egg production, show quality or even egg color,” Templeton added. “It’s about what the person or family wants to get out of the experience.”

Backyard chicken seminar
Nashua Farmers’ Exchange (38 1/2 Bridge St., Nashua) will host a poultry seminar on Saturday, March 11, at 10 a.m. The seminar will cover the basics of raising chickens, including how to get set up and how to care for chicks and full-grown chickens. It’s free and open to the public. Visit nashuafarmers.com/events/chicken-seminar-2023.

What’s the best way to start — from eggs, chicks or grown chickens?

There are advantages and disadvantages to each, but ultimately it’s a matter of personal preference, based on the kind of experience you want and the amount of time and money you’re willing to invest.

Hatching from eggs can be a fun and educational project for families. However, Majewski warned, it can be hard to find fertilized eggs that have been properly screened to be disease-free. Hatching also requires an incubator and other expensive equipment, and the conditions in the incubator must be frequently monitored and maintained. Finally, even if you do everything right, there’s still no guarantee that the eggs will hatch.

Starting with chicks also requires some extra equipment, including a heat source and special food and water dispenser, and some extra care for a few weeks while the chicks are at their most fragile, but chicks are less expensive — and less risky — than hatching from eggs.

“Many farm supply stores offer pre-orders for chicks, allowing customers to order exactly what they want,” Davis said, adding that in New Hampshire an order must include a minimum of six chicks. “For those wanting laying hens, the retailer can help you determine if a chick is female. In many breeds there is a color difference of the males, although this is not 100 percent.”

It takes four months or longer from the time a female chick is born until it starts laying eggs.

• If you want to skip the wait, you can purchase “pullets” — young hens that have not started laying eggs yet but are expected to start soon.

“They save you the time and bother of brooding and rearing chicks, and they’re ready to start laying within just a week or so of getting settled in at your home,” Majewski said, “but they are more expensive. They can go for around $20 apiece, versus $3 for a chick.”

Do I need a rooster?

“It is a common misconception that you need to have a rooster for hens to lay eggs,” Davis said. “This is not true. The hens will lay eggs without a rooster.”

There is an argument to be made that hens are happier and feel safer having a rooster around, but most chicken owners who aren’t interested in producing fertilized eggs opt not to have one.

“Mature roosters are undesirable for many people,” Davis said. “They are loud, crowing not just in the morning but throughout the day. They may be aggressive to other poultry and to human caregivers, and two or more roosters may often fight one another.”

“They’re kind of obnoxious,” Majewski added. “They really do crow at an ungodly hour of the morning, and their voices can carry for a half mile — not a great way to stay on your neighbors’ good side.”

3 chickens pecking in grass, each a different color
Buff Orpington chicken (back), Barred Rock chicken (middle) and Rhode Island Red chicken (front). Photo courtesy of UNH Cooperative Extension.

What kind of housing and essential items are needed to raise chickens?

The proper dimensions for a coop, Majewski said, should include at least 3 square feet of floor space per chicken and an additional 10 square feet of fenced outdoor space per chicken.

“This doesn’t need to be elaborate,” he said. “If you don’t have great carpentry skills, it’s fine to requisition and/or modify a portion of a shed or even the garage.”

Next you’ll need feeders and waterers — enough to give each chicken at least 4 inches of space. Supplemental heat lamps aren’t necessary for adult chickens.

“Those feathers provide remarkable insulation,” Majewskis said. “I’ve seen our birds running around outside in January with the temperature in the teens.”

What supplies are needed for maintenance and care, and what is the average monthly cost?

Feed is the main expense. Majewski said a 50-pound bag of conventional feed, which lasts a small flock a little over a month, costs around $20 to $25. A non-GMO or organic feed will cost more. Bedding for the coop — usually wood shavings — may cost around $10 to $15 and should be refreshed at least monthly, after cleaning the coop.

What’s on the chore list for raising chickens? What’s the time commitment?

Most people find a small flock of six to 12 adult chickens is easy to manage, even if they work a regular job.

“It really takes no more than 20 minutes per day to collect eggs, refill water and feed and do general wellness checks,” Kunelius said.

The only chore that you may have to set aside some time for is cleaning the coop. Majewski said most coops should “ideally be cleaned weekly, but at a minimum once per month.”

Where to buy chicken supplies
• Achille Agway, 351 Elm St., Milford, 673-1669; 65 Jaffrey Road, Peterborough, 924-6801, achilleagway.com
• Cloverdale Feed & Farm Supply, 12 Roby Road, Webster, 746-3234, cloverdalefeed.com
• Dodge Grain Co., 59 N. Broadway, Salem, 893-3739, dodgegrain.biz
• Nashua Farmers’ Exchange, 38 1/2 Bridge St., Nashua, 883-9531, nashuafarmers.com
• Osborne’s Farm & Garden Center, 16 Cinemagic Way, Hooksett, 627-6855; 258 Sheep Davis Road, Concord, 228-8561, osbornesfarm.com
• Tractor Supply Co., locations throughout New Hampshire, including Hooksett, Derry, Merrimack, Chichester, Plaistow, Milford and Pelham, tractorsupply.com
Where to buy live chickens
• Cloverdale Feed & Farm Supply, 12 Roby Road, Webster, 746-3234, cloverdalefeed.com
• Dodge Grain Co., 59 N. Broadway, Salem, 893-3739, dodgegrain.biz
• Nashua Farmers’ Exchange, 38 1/2 Bridge St., Nashua, 883-9531, nashuafarmers.com. Deadline for chick orders is March 25.
• Osborne’s Farm & Garden Center, 16 Cinemagic Way, Hooksett, 627-6855; 258 Sheep Davis Road, Concord, 228-8561, osbornesfarm.com
• Templeton Family Organics, 176 Kennedy Hill Road, Goffstown, ​781-316-5067, templetonfamilyorganics.com
• Tractor Supply Co., locations throughout New Hampshire, including Hooksett, Derry, Merrimack, Chichester, Plaistow, Milford and Pelham, tractorsupply.com

Are there any safety concerns I should be aware of?

New Hampshire chicken experts mentioned three main dangers:

Fires. Heat lamps are only needed for raising chicks; adult chickens do not need a heat lamp to stay warm during the colder months, but some chicken owners still choose to use one. In any case where a heat lamp is being used, exercise caution to prevent fires.

“Follow the safety guidelines included with your heat lamp to keep the heat source a safe distance from combustible items,” Davis said. “In the winter, water deicers can also be a fire concern. Always make sure all your equipment is in good condition and functioning properly.”

Biohazards. “Salmonella or other bacteria can be present on birds, on eggs and in coop areas,” Kunelius said.

Wash your hands directly after handling poultry and related equipment.

In recent months, avian influenza has also been a concern with chickens and other birds nationwide.

“There is currently an avian influenza outbreak in migratory wild birds that can spread to domestic poultry and other animals. As of early 2023, there had been no human cases in the U.S. You can prevent exposure of your birds by limiting their exposure to wild birds, especially waterfowl such as ducks and geese,” Davis said. And the best way to limit that exposure is basically to have them penned up and not let them free range, she said.

Wildlife. “Predators are a real issue,” Majewski said. “[Raising chickens] probably won’t significantly increase the number of encounters you have with wildlife, but it does affect the welfare of the birds themselves.”

Free-range chickens are at a greater risk.

“Keeping them fenced in — with adequate space, of course — is much better for all concerned,” Majewski said.

How many eggs can I expect to get, and how often?

“In peak production, a hen will lay an egg approximately every 26 hours, so you pretty much get an egg per day,” Majewski said. “A small flock of four to six hens kept in good condition will provide the average family plenty of eggs, with an extra dozen for friends and family on a regular basis.”

Older hens lay eggs at a lower rate — usually about every other day, but sometimes less.

How long do chickens live? Is it common to keep a chicken for its whole natural life?

Most chickens can live to between five and eight years. Chickens that are raised for meat are usually processed at a young age. Hens lay eggs at peak productivity for two to three years. When a hen’s laying starts slowing down, a chicken owner may make a decision about what comes next for the chicken.

“A pampered chicken can live for several years, and people have kept them for that long when they become sort-of pets,” Majewski said. “[An older hen] still lays occasional eggs, but they’re not really earning their keep. We keep ours at home for about two years, and then they make the transition from breakfast feature to, um, soup.”

Are there any benefits to raising chickens besides poultry products?

Davis said free-range chickens can help to control a variety of insects, and chickens’ manure and used bedding can be composted for later use in the garden.

“Chickens offer great tick control and fertilize your lawn,” Templeton added.

Raising chickens can be especially rewarding for families with children.

“It offers a way for families to do something together and reconnect,” Templeton said. “It is also a great way to teach children responsibility and in a world where people have become far from their food source it provides an opportunity to be close to it.”

Adopt a rooster

Frosty is a rooster available for adoption at the New Hampshire SPCA (104 Portsmouth Ave., Stratham). According to the NHSPCA website, Frosty was a stray found in Durham and is now looking for his perfect home. He gets along with other birds and would love to have a flock of his own.

Horhey is also a rooster available for adoption at the New Hampshire SPCA. According to the NHSPCA website, this handsome guy is very friendly and gets along with other roosters and hens. He is easygoing and would make a nice addition to any flock.

To learn more about chickens and other farm animals available for adoption at the NHSPCA, visit nhspca.org/adoptable-animals or email mmurch@nhspca.org.

News & Notes 23/03/09

Clean water funds

U.S. Sens. Jeanne Shaheen and Maggie Hassan, alongside Reps. Annie Kuster and Chris Pappas, welcomed $23,186,000 to support clean water infrastructure upgrades in New Hampshire. According to a press release, the funds are allocated through the Bipartisan Infrastructure Law and distributed by the Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) to the State’s Clean Water State Revolving Fund (CWSRF). The upgrades will be made to essential water, wastewater and stormwater infrastructure that protects public health and treasured water bodies. $2.1 million has been designated to address contaminants such as per- and polyfluoroalkyl substances, more commonly known as PFAS, a class of industrial chemicals used in Teflon, GoreTex, carpeting, food wrappers, firefighting foam and other products, which take decades to break down and can build up in the body. “Everyone deserves access to clean water,” Sen. Shaheen said in the release. “Investing in modern water infrastructure is essential for preventing pollution and driving economic development in our communities.”

Community Impact awards

Dartmouth Health is accepting nominations now through March 21 for its first annual Community Impact Social Justice Awards. According to a press release, the awards were created by Dartmouth Health’s Black, Indigenous, and People of Color Employee Resource Group to recognize individuals who have demonstrated active engagement in social justice action, empowering marginalized communities and promoting human rights to facilitate ongoing inclusive change. Awards will be given in three categories: to a community member, a youth community member under age 24 and a Dartmouth Health employee. Visit dartmouth-health.org/news/honoring-those-working-toward-deib to access a nomination form. The awards ceremony will take place at the New Hampshire Audubon Society (84 Silk Farm Road, Concord) on Saturday, April 29, at 6 p.m. Search “Community Impact Social Justice Awards” on Eventbrite for tickets to the event.

Student scientists

Students in grades 5 through 8 are invited to compete in the annual 3M Young Scientist Challenge, presented by 3M and Discovery Education. According to a press release, the nationwide competition gives student innovators an opportunity to compete for a variety of prizes, such as an exclusive mentorship with a 3M scientist, a $25,000 grand prize and a chance to earn the title of “America’s Top Young Scientist.” To enter, students should submit a one- to two-minute video explaining an original idea using science to help solve an everyday problem. “This is such a fun and unique way for students to showcase their scientific minds and explore how they can truly make a difference in the world — even at such a young age,” New Hampshire Education Commissioner Frank Edelblut said in the release. The submission deadline is April 27. Visit YoungScientistLab.com.

Student inventors

New Hampshire Gov. Chris Sununu has issued a proclamation declaring March 18 “New Hampshire Kid Inventor Day.” According to a press release, the first annual celebration coincides with the K-12 Invention Convention Regional Finals at the University of New Hampshire in Durham. The competition recognizes the innovation and achievement of talented young inventors and showcases the ingenious ideas developed this year. “New Hampshire is full of talented and bright young learners, and this honor gives students a perfect opportunity to celebrate their inventive spirit,” Tina White, Director for the Young Inventors’ Program and the Northern New England Regional Invention Convention, said in the release. “We hope that with each annual celebration of New Hampshire Kid Inventor Day, we’ll have more and more students throughout the state experiencing the benefits of Invention Education.”

State Archivist

New Hampshire Secretary of State David Scanlan announced the appointment of Ashley Miller as New Hampshire’s new State Archivist. According to a press release, Miller’s appointment was approved at the Governor and Executive Council meeting on Feb. 8, and she was officially sworn in on Feb. 22 at the Secretary of State’s Office. Miller, a resident of Concord, was previously the Archivist, Reference and Outreach Coordinator for the Concord Public Library. She holds master’s degrees in Archives Management and History from Simmons College and a bachelor’s degree in History from Pennsylvania State University. “Ms. Miller will bring a great deal of knowledge and enthusiasm to the position, especially in digital archiving,” Secretary Scanlan said in the release. “Articulate and engaging, she is well equipped to manage the Archives Division and move it forward with the use of technology.”

Intown Concord, the nonprofit community organization that hosts the annual Market Days street festival in downtown Concord in June, has received a $5,100 Arts for Community Engagement (ACE) project grant. According to a press release, the grant, awarded by the New Hampshire State Council on the Arts, will support local artists who perform at the festival. “This grant will help us compensate local musicians who have been performing for free at Market Days for over a decade,” Jessica Martin, Executive Director of Intown Concord, said in the release.

The Atkinson Historical Society will grant a $1,000 scholarship to a graduating Atkinson high school senior who has been involved in their community through volunteering, civics, local government, scouting and other activities, according to a press release. Eligible students can be graduating from any accredited high school but must be a resident of Atkinson during their senior year. Applications are available at atkinsonhistoricalsociety.org. Email atkinson.nh.history@gmail.com.

Hollis Social Library presents a live performance by musician Jeff Snow at the Lawrence Barn in Hollis (28 Depot Road) on Sunday, March 12, from 2 to 4 p.m. According to a press release, Jeff Snow plays six- and 12-string guitar, autoharp and Celtic bouzouki and bodhran, combining Irish and Scottish music, stories and history in his performances. Registration is required. Visit hollislibrary.org.

As we progress

A few months ago my husband and I were in Illinois visiting my 82-year-old mother. We pulled into a burger joint for lunch and went inside to eat. This was a favorite spot of my mother’s, and we had always enjoyed it as well. Once inside, I noticed a panicked look on her face when she realized there were no longer any waitstaff, and we were required to use a kiosk to place our order and pay. I assured my mom this was not a problem, and we could do it, which we did. However, my mom noted she wouldn’t be able to come here any longer because she would never be able to order on her own. She seemed resigned to it even though I tried to encourage her to give it a try.

Fast-forward to a conversation I had recently with our 18-year-old son regarding ChatGPT (an AI-powered chatbot) and the utilization of that in various areas. We had a very spirited debate on how it should be used in education, research and communication. We marveled that ChatGPT was able to pass a law school exam, the medical licensing exam and the Wharton MBA exam. My son commented that at some point AI will replace humans in almost everything. I disagreed, but as many of you know, you never win an argument with an 18-year-old.

Ironically, during this debate, we happened to be dining at a restaurant using a tableside tablet to play trivia games and used that to pay. This prompted me to tell our son about the experience with his grandmother. I commented that there is a segment of the population that is getting left behind with the pace of technological advancement. For these folks, the things that we take for granted (ordering from Amazon with one click, online shopping, Apple Pay, online bill paying, etc.) are not only a struggle, but many times simply impossible.

Change is difficult, and we all have different capacities for it. It seems as though we should be addressing this skills/learning gap in our society to encourage engagement and participation versus isolation and withdrawal. In the meantime, be kind and be patient. Lend a helping hand when someone is struggling ahead of you in line. Help to restore faith in mankind.

One voice

International guitar duo performs in Concord

The best guitar duos carry on a conversation with their instruments, but Nicola Cipriani and Brad Myrick engage in musical mind-melding, two sonic serpents swirling into a rope of notes. The Italian-born Cipriani and Concord native Myrick recall the similarly synchronistic Tom Verlaine and Richard Lloyd, of the ’70s rock band Television.

Those two, though, had amplifiers. not to mention lyrics and a rhythm section. Cipriani and Myrick speak strictly through their fretboards — and they’re unplugged. On stage, they sit in angled chairs to play, with eyes moving fluidly between each other and an eavesdropping audience.

They also compose this way, a practice firmed up on the 2020 album Reflections. Released in the spring of that year, this fine effort disappeared in the pandemic’s fog. A canceled world tour was another costly problem, and even worse was the lockdown’s impact on their creative process.

“We tried to compose from a distance,” Myrick recalled in a recent joint interview with Cipriani. “For the kind of music that we do, it ended up being impossible…. We need to be in the room together, have the interplay, the visual connection. We just found that it wasn’t working out, so basically we were on pause for almost three years.”

Finally, the two have new a new album, Silver Lining, and are back on tour. They spoke during a pause on a Southern run that wrapped up in Asheville. It resumes with a show at Bank of NH Stage on March 5, and another the next day at UNH’s Paul Creative Arts Center. In April they’re in Italy, and they hope to book a few South American dates later in the year.

The cover of the new album is a monochrome Noemi Trazzi photo of Myrick and Cipriani facing each other in a terminal. This theme is explored in the opening track, “Ritrovarsi.” The Italian word translates to “find again,” and for Cipriani, the joyous, playful track has “a double meaning … to find ourselves again as artists and composers, and find each other.”

“Like reunite,” Myrick added.

With all the talk of Covid silver linings in the world of music like extra time to reflect and write, there weren’t many for the duo. That’s reflected on the new album. With titles like “Ode To Solitude” and “Remember To Breathe,” many of its songs came from “the experience that we had all been through,” Myrick said. “There was a lot of darkness in there, some tension, some melancholy.”

The seemingly ironic title was chosen, Myrick explained, because “we found that there was still so much good that we were able to pull out, even in this really challenging time — for me particularly.” That said, Silver Lining isn’t intentionally a pandemic album. “A lot of artists made those,” Cipriani said, while allowing that “it was a perfect photography of where we were at the time, actually.”

A suite in three stages, “Dragonfly Ritual” is one of the record’s celebratory moments. “I think that speaks to silver linings,” said Myrick, who wrote it as he watched the regal insects mating from his back window. “They’re attached as they’re flying, then they detach. I think they’re the only animal that does that; it’s this really incredible kind of ritual.”

Though a tonic, quiet contemplation doesn’t compare to the feeling Cipriani and Myrick had walking on stage and leaving with a standing ovation a few weeks ago at Coastal Carolina University, where they once recorded a live album.

“It was rewarding and it was inspiring,” Myrick said. “It is just totally propelling us forward. For me at least, and Nicola can tell me if this is true for him, it’s confirming that this is exactly what I should be doing artistically right now.”

“It is a huge privilege, what we are able to do…. I never get the sensation that I’m doing a kind of a normal job,” Cipriani agreed. “When we go to places like the university, and get the chance to meet a lot of people, especially young students that are really passionate and searching for their own artistic way, it’s so inspiring.”

One big benefit of live performance is it gives their instrumental music a narrative.

“We get to tell the stories and share the ideas behind it, so we can give people a little bit more information before they listen,” Myrick said. “Here’s what we were feeling, this is what sparked the idea; now maybe you have an idea in your head, and you can take it into a place, follow on the journey, and make it your own with us.”

Nicola Cipriani and Brad Myrick
When: Sunday, March 5, 6:30 p.m.
Where: Bank of NH Stage, 44 S Main St., Concord
Tickets: $23.75 at ccanh.com
Also Monday, March 6, 8 p.m., Paul Creative Arts Center (Verrette Recital Hall), 30 Academic Way, Durham

Featured photo: Nicola Cipriani & Brad Myrick. Courtesy photo.

Cocaine Bear (R)

A bear does cocaine in Cocaine Bear, a movie that is 100 percent exactly what you think it’s going to be.

This movie opens with title cards giving us facts about black bears citing Wikipedia as its source, which feels tonally perfect. Like, here’s some information but we didn’t work super hard to get it and we don’t stand by its accuracy. (But, speaking of Wikipedia, a link on this movie’s Wikipedia page will take you to the tale of the “real life” Cocaine Bear, who has apparently been stuffed and is now on display at something called the “Kentucky for Kentucky Fun Mall” and also the bear’s nickname is sometimes “Pablo Eskobear” and, well, I definitely recommend the “Cocaine Bear” Wikipedia page.) This movie is directed by Elizabeth Banks and if you can picture her seriously reading you facts about bears, that gives you a sense of where this movie is, vibe-wise, even though she herself doesn’t appear in the movie.

It’s the “this is your brain on drugs” 1980s and a drug smuggler dumps duffel bags filled with cocaine out of an airplane and into a Georgia forest before jumping himself. Well, before preparing to jump himself. Before he can actually jump, he bonks his head, falls out of the plane and ends up splatting in someone’s yard. But the gang expecting the cocaine — led by Syd (Ray Liotta, in his final role, according to IMDb) — knows that most of it is still out there and needs to go collect it so as not to incur the wrath of the cartel wholesaling it to them. Syd sends his son, Eddie (Alden Ehrenreich), who is still grieving the loss of his wife and is generally disinterested in his dad’s whole drug-dealing thing, and Daveed (O’Shea Jackson Jr.), a friend to Eddie but also no-nonsense in his approach to the cocaine retrieval, to find the missing drugs.

Bob (Isiah Whitlock Jr.), nominally a detective but primarily an Isiah Whitlock character, suspects that Syd’s gang might be looking for the cocaine and goes on the hunt for it in hopes of nabbing them.

Before those opposing forces can get to the drugs, though, a trio of crime-minded dummies — whose IMDb names are “Kid (Stache)” (Aaron Holliday), “Vest” (J. B. Moore) and “Ponytail” (Leo Hanna) — find one of the duffels and hides it in the forest, hoping to go back for it later.

But before any of these guys start their cocaine search, a large female black bear finds some of the cocaine, consumes it and decides she loves cocaine. She is single-minded on getting more cocaine — possibly grunting something like “yum yum” when she’s near it? maybe that was my imagination. And while not usually portrayed this way, cocaine seems to give her the munchies, specifically for humans, the more clueless the better.

This is bad news not just for the cops and criminals on the search for the drugs but also for anybody who happens to be in the woods, like for example single mother Sari (Keri Russell), searching for her tween-ish-aged daughter Dee Dee (Brooklynn Prince) and Dee Dee’s buddy Henry (Christian Convery), who have cut school to go to the forest in search of a waterfall. And forest ranger Liz (Margo Martindale), who is far more concerned with seducing wildlife expert Peter (Jesse Tyler Ferguson).

Everybody, every Margo Martindale and Keri Russell and Ray Liotta body, seems to be having a total blast here — and why not. The movie is called Cocaine Bear and the coked up bear quickly overtakes all other storylines and character elements as being the key issue of the movie. This is not a horror movie, this isn’t even a thriller really, it’s just a bear, on cocaine, chasing O’Shea Jackson Jr., who like his dad (Ice Cube) is solid at being the straight man in a wacky situation. What’s not to enjoy? The movie — like this year’s Plane or last year’s Beast — is totally and completely up front about what it is going to deliver to you and then it delivers exactly that. What are this movie’s themes? Bear on cocaine. What is this movie’s central argument? That a bear on cocaine will want more cocaine. What does this movie make you feel? That you are watching a bear on cocaine — or, you know, a good-enough rendering of a bear. This movie does have some gore, which feels more for the comic “ew” of it all than to really induce fear. There is a “glued on mustache” sensibility that pervades this movie, which perhaps keeps it from reaching some, I don’t know, higher height of intoxicated bear cinema but also keeps things humming along at a nicely unserious, deliberately shabby level. Which is all to say, if Cocaine Bear seems both really stupid and like something you, with your daily stresses and worries, might need in your life, you are absolutely correct. B

Rated R for bloody violence and gore, drug content and language throughout, according to the MPA on filmratings.com. Directed by Elizabeth Banks and written by Jimmy Warden, Cocaine Bear is an hour and 35 minutes long and is distributed in theaters by Universal Studios.

Featured photo: Cocaine Bear.

Get it made

Lighthouse Local, Bedford Baking Co. now open

A new cafe and market now open in Bedford aims to be a one-stop shopping destination for a wide variety of New Hampshire-made goods, from jams, jellies and maple syrups to infused cooking oils, blended coffees and teas, chocolates and more.

Lighthouse Local, housed in the former Sweet Boutique space on Kilton Road, is also home to the Bedford Baking Co., which offers freshly baked breads and pastries alongside a menu of hot paninis and cold sandwiches. Both concepts arrived just after the new year, according to owner and longtime Bedford resident Linda Degler, who took over the space in September.

Degler, who also runs the Bedford Event Center and New Morning Schools, said the shop’s original conception stemmed from her enjoyment of baking. The idea to feature a retail area of local products, meanwhile, came from coordination with the nonprofit New Hampshire Made.

“I thought, ‘Yeah, we’re local and we’re small, but then so are they and so are they,’ and so why don’t we just bring them all together,” she said. “I mean, it’s basically like throwing a party. You have friends from this circle and friends from that circle and you introduce them and it’s fun.”

Out of the gate, the shop has retail products available for sale from companies like Ben’s Sugar Shack, Van Otis Chocolates, Laurel Hill Jams & Jellies, Monadnock Oil & Vinegar Co. and the Yankee Farmer’s Market. Degler noted that the shop is also the first brick-and-mortar account for 603 Perfect Blend, run by a Manchester-based husband and wife team that is known in the local farmers market circuit for their loose-leaf teas and gourmet flavored sugars.

For several of its featured products Lighthouse Local offers samples during business hours. Degler said she plans to continue growing the retail space with additional purveyors. Although most hail from the Granite State, she said she is open to having others from neighboring states.

“This started with New Hampshire Made, and now people are calling us,” she said.

On the bakery side, Degler has partnered with Trina Bird of the Bird Food Baking Co. to oversee pastries. Bird, of Goffstown, is perhaps best known locally for her craft doughnuts, of which she has made a countless number of wild flavors, as well as her cakes, cupcakes and cookies.

Degler has also recruited Natalie Camasso as an in-house baker; Fylisity Baker-Scott, who primarily runs the front; and Kyle Altman, a former manager at Mile Away Restaurant in Milford who created the shop’s lunch menu. Offerings to start have included a few sandwiches and paninis, with some fresh sides, like cranberry coleslaw, cucumber pesto, and mozzarella and tomato with a balsamic glaze.

As with the retail area, Degler’s goal is to grow the bakery arm of the business.

“I am interested in renting kitchen space … maybe to new bakers who want to get a foot in but maybe they don’t have a kitchen … and we’ll sell their products down here to get [them] started,” she said. “I’d like to find somebody who supplies breakfast pastries. That would be a really good addition here, especially with all the office buildings around.”

Lighthouse Local/Bedford Baking Co.
Where: 21 Kilton Road, Bedford
Hours: Wednesday through Sunday, 9 a.m. to 2 p.m.
More info: Visit lighthouse-local.com, or find them on Facebook @lighthouselocalcafe or on Instagram @lighthouselocal
Suppliers interested in getting their products on the shelves of Lighthouse Local can contact owner Linda Degler directly at lindadegler@gmail.com.

Featured photo: Baked goods from Lighthouse Local. Photo by Linda Degler.

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