Why to marry at a museum, fall versus spring, and the trouble with desserts
Wedding tips and stories from the pros
You probably want too much dessert.
That’s one of the takeaways from the wedding planners who offer their experiences arranging couples’ special days. Wedding planner Anja Matukic reminds us that all the times you may have left a wedding early point to less need for desserts than most couples assume when they are planning their wedding meal.
Looking for more ideas on ways to make your wedding memorable and how to avoid some pitfalls? Take advice from these experts.
Anja Matukic of Fete & Festoon
Manchester, fetefestoon.com
How did you get into the wedding business?
I studied hospitality and events in college and got my professional experience in the hospitality industry. I was working for a corporate planning company based in Boston when the pandemic hit and I lost my job. I had done some freelance event work here and there and always thought about starting my own business. I strategized a brief business plan, made a website and some business cards, and here we are today. One reason I particularly love weddings is the strong sentiment and emotion behind each experience. These are such special days … and I love that I get to be a small part of it.
Describe one of your most memorable weddings.
It was an oceanfront September event in 2021. Min and Hunter hosted their wedding on Hunter’s parents’ property — a private yacht club in Portsmouth. It was a custom-built event from start to finish that contributed to the guest experience while showcasing their love story. They honored the groom’s late mother in countless ways: just like for Hunter’s parents’ wedding, Min was brought to the ceremony on a boat, and they had the ceremony on the pier. They were married by the same bishop and danced to the same band that performed at the groom’s parents’ wedding nearly 30 years earlier. Hunter’s father built a deck on the island’s edge, which was used as the dance floor. Engineers themselves, Min and Hunter built their own marquee lights, lighting fixtures that hung in the tent and wood lanterns for centerpieces. Min’s family traveled from South Korea to attend, and they honored her family’s background with a custom menu served by the yacht club’s private caterer. It was an expertly crafted quintessential New England wedding day, enhanced enormously with the couple’s personal touches.
What’s a fun wedding location people may not have considered?
I’m a sucker for museums. One gorgeous, often unconsidered location is Manchester’s Currier Museum of Art. They have several stunning spaces to pick from, and it’s not your traditional wedding space; it’s a little bit of Europe in southern New Hampshire, and it feels so elevated. Plus, designing your wedding is much simpler when you have literal masterpieces surrounding you.
Winter, spring, summer or fall wedding, and why?
Early fall, right at the tail end of summer. The air has that touch of crispness to it, but the sunshine and warm temperatures still hold up without feeling scorching hot. It’s the perfect weather to wear a suit without sweating through it and to wear any style of dress. You’ve got quite a broad selection of design themes and florals to pick from.
What’s one thing that’s worth spending extra money on? What’s something that you can go cheap with?
Many couples think they can skip out on a planner. I’m not saying you need to hire someone to plan your wedding, but you should at least hire someone to execute your wedding weekend. … All events are prone to in-the-moment changes and potential disasters, and you want someone in your corner who understands your values and will take care of it. They’ll trouble-solve the inevitable issues, make sure everyone’s where they need to be and pick up the pieces when a vendor drops the ball. … You’ll feel that weight lifted off your shoulders … so that you can enjoy every moment.
You can save some money on dessert. Almost every couple over-orders their dessert when there are many guests who won’t indulge or will leave before it’s even served. I recommend only purchasing enough dessert for 70 percent of your guest count.
Recount a wedding mishap and how you handled it.
The dessert provider delivered a three-tier cake minutes before the ceremony — completely smashed. The top tier looked just fine, but there was no way the bottom two tiers could be salvaged aesthetically. The venue and I put our MacGyver hats on. The cake was supposed to sit on a flat cake stand in the center of a dessert display. The one tier would have looked silly if we stuck with that plan, so we decided to build a taller cake stand to keep a similar setup. We were able to salvage the second tier using some icing from the bottom, but it didn’t look pretty. Once we put the cake on the stand, we hid the imperfections with some leftover blooms that matched the topper — and voila. During the ceremony we contacted another baker who was able to give us a couple of smaller cakes to feed the guests. Our makeshift two-tier delight lasted long enough to cut into the top tier, and then the venue sliced up the backup cakes to serve guests. The couple didn’t even notice.
How do you help a couple when each partner has a different vision for their wedding?
My first step, before we even begin planning, is to get to the root of why they’re even hosting a wedding. It sounds like a silly conversation at first, answering a seemingly simple question — why are you having a wedding? With every response, I continue to ask ‘why?’ until we get to the deep, meaningful heart of it, and that becomes my mission for the entire experience. When it’s time to start making decisions, I always refer back to this and triple-check that the decision contributes to that mission. When a couple has disagreeing visions, we’ll come back to this ‘why’ together and have a discussion comparing their visions. Sometimes one partner will quickly realize their vision doesn’t contribute to the mission. Other times we’ll take pieces of both visions to craft something truly theirs.
How are weddings today different from what they were pre-pandemic?
The pandemic … forced the world to slow down and consider how time is passing them by, and the same is true for weddings. Couples are more in tune with what’s important to them and why, and they’re not as willing to compromise on those values because of family expectations or tradition. Weddings feel more personal and less like the pageantry of the past. If a tradition doesn’t feel right, get rid of it.
Angela Desrochers of Angela Marie Weddings
Deerfield, angelamarieweddings.com
How did you get into the wedding business?
I decided to become a wedding planner after planning my own wedding. I wanted to work for myself and have more flexibility with young kids at home. My background in data analysis was a great asset to making this transition since wedding planning is all about details, organization, time management and logistics. Wedding design has allowed me to tap into my more creative side.
Describe one of your most memorable weddings.
Our favorites are those that bring in elements that embrace them personally, such as Dungeons & Dragons-themed centerpieces or Nerf guns. Yes, we had a group of bridesmaids ambush the groomsmen with Nerf guns. One of my favorites was an autumn boho wedding inspired by the Celtic harvest at Allrose Farm in Greenfield. They selected Celtic music and included an ancient Celtic oathing stone ritual during their ceremony. Every element and detail represented the couple and their love for one another.
What’s a fun wedding location people may not have considered?
Non-traditional wedding locations sometimes come with unique logistical challenges, but a butterfly sanctuary, zoo, aquarium or museum are great options we don’t see a lot of. A warehouse or nightclub are also great blank canvas options to design however you want.
Winter, spring, summer or fall wedding, and why?
We love fall weddings. The fall foliage and vibrant colors of nature make for a beautiful backdrop. We’d like to see more winter weddings. They’re not ideal for outdoor weddings, but many venues have off-season pricing, making it a great option for your wallet. The snow is pretty, too.
What’s one thing that’s worth spending extra money on? What’s something you can go cheap with?
This [depends on] what the priorities of the couple are. When a couple is looking to cut costs, we recommend a lower budget for flowers and stationary. Also consider, in place of a full open bar, serving beer, wine and a signature cocktail. Food and entertainment are often areas that couples are happy to spend extra money on, as a great guest experience is typically a high priority.
Recount a wedding mishap and how you handled it.
Being in the wedding business for nearly 10 years, we’ve had our fair share of mishaps ranging from a guest falling and dislocating a shoulder and Champagne flutes left off a rental order, to an intoxicated guest making a scene. It’s important to stay calm and in control, helping to keep the couple and guests calm as well. … Recently we had a DJ who was two hours late. We found a portable speaker and a Spotify playlist to get through cocktail hour, organized the bridesmaids to announce the newlyweds, made a few toasts without a microphone and rearranged the timeline to move the first dance to later in the evening, but everything stayed on track, and at the end of the day everyone was happy.
How do you help a couple when each partner has a different vision for their wedding?
It’s important to get couples on the same page before the planning begins. We discuss each of their individual priorities and then come up with joint priorities. It’s a simple but effective exercise. We [act as] a third party impartial resource, providing facts and pros and cons to help them make a decision they both will be happy with.
How are weddings today different from what they were pre-pandemic?
Things are mostly back to the way they were before — no more concerns about social distancing, masks and sanitizer or buffets and food stations. The biggest impact we’re seeing is inflation; everything just costs more, which has forced couples to downsize their flowers or reduce their guest counts to save on food costs.
Christa McLean of Christa McLean Events
Raymond, christamcleanevents.com
How did you get into the wedding business?
Growing up and working my way up the ladder in hospitality, I always found the most special occasions were the occasions I could help make lifelong memories for guests. … Being around events for years, eventually you find a natural rhythm in planning and executing. … I coordinated and managed weddings periodically, but after a long commute back to New Hampshire from managing a music venue in Cambridge, I connected with a New Hampshire wedding venue and worked at that venue full time for eight years before starting my business.
Describe one of your most memorable weddings.
It took place on the most perfect fall day. … This wedding had some hiccups along the way, but the solutions truly worked out better than the original plans, so we had an ‘everything happens for a reason’ mantra going on. The wedding professionals had all worked together numerous times so the flow was on point. There were a few special entertainers, including the bagpiper from Dropkick Murphys and Celtic music by Celtic Beats as well as traditional Scottish line dancing. The key features in this wedding were personal to the couple. During planning, they came up with epic ideas, then discussed with their vendors, who all discussed together to come up with the best way to execute.
What’s a fun wedding location people may not have considered?
Flag Hill Distillery and Winery has a special place in my heart. Its vineyard is stunning July through September, and it’s fun that you can go back to visit for a tasting on your anniversary.
Winter, spring, summer or fall wedding, and why?
There’s certainly a magic about fall weddings in New England, but each season has pros and cons. … If you have travelers, don’t choose winter in case of inclement weather. If you’re choosing an outdoor venue, spring is great due to freshly done landscaping. Summer will provide the full, lush greenery that’s so trendy. Ultimately, choosing a date that’s special to you or will allow you to have a special anniversary is a good idea. But if you go into wedding planning with a season in mind but not a date, that’ll allow you to find your perfect venue and then base your date on the availability.
What’s one thing that’s worth spending extra money on? What’s something you can go cheap with?
Don’t downplay the importance of photos and video. Whenever I have a hard day or am in a mood, I watch my wedding video and am able to snap back into a good place. To be able to capture memories of your best day ever is amazing and can only happen once. Imagine hiring someone who misses a special moment. Go cheap with programs and favors; they’re usually left behind by guests.
Recount a wedding mishap and how you handled it.
The buses that someone was supposed to book weren’t actually booked, and guests weren’t going to get there for the ceremony that was starting in 20 minutes. I called a connection at the bus company and had two buses ASAP. The ceremony started 20 minutes late, but just about everyone was there and had a great time, and the bride didn’t find out until the end of night.
How do you help a couple when each partner has a different vision for their wedding?
I discuss pros and cons based on experience. We find a way to sometimes weigh what the priorities for each of them are and meet in the middle of some ideas. Coming together to plan the biggest event you’ll ever throw for yourself can be a lot, but you learn to compromise when needed.
How are weddings today different from what they were pre-pandemic?
I’m seeing less [weddings with] 200+ [guests]. Couples are also definitely more interested in how things are going to be executed, especially food. Pre-pandemic the focus was more on if the food tastes good and is at a fair cost. Now I get more questions about where it’ll be and how it’ll be served.
Melanie Voros of Blissful Beginnings Wedding & Event Design
Bedford, blissfulbeginnings.com
How did you get into the wedding business?
I celebrated Blissful Beginnings’ 25th anniversary last fall. I had been working in a bridal shop and loved the elements of fashion and design, but I equally enjoyed working with the brides and their entourage, helping them stay on budget and hearing about the event details. … At the time, wedding planning wasn’t something you could study in college, so I took a certificate course through Weddings Beautiful Worldwide to become a certified wedding planner and opened my business shortly thereafter. Over these 25 years, I’ve worked with over 1,500 weddings across New England.
Describe one of your most memorable weddings.
One extra-special wedding was actually a 10-year surprise vow renewal and anniversary party for a couple whose wedding I planned and officiated back in 2012. The husband called on me to help him coordinate this 120-guest party as a complete surprise to his wife, back at the same venue where they were married the first time. I was honored to once again officiate their ceremony as well. And I would be remiss if I didn’t mention the wedding in Jackson, New Hampshire, where I met my now-husband back on July 7, 2007.
What’s a fun wedding location people may not have considered?
The most special locations are those that mean something to the clients, so I often work at private homes, family vacation spots and places where memories can continue to be made long after the wedding day. Many clients choose to incorporate fun excursions or activities … to introduce their guests to a place that’s special to them. One couple planned a scavenger hunt on the campus of their alma mater Dartmouth College to share the story of how they met with their friends and family.
Winter, spring, summer or fall wedding, and why?
In New England, ‘wedding season’ is mainly spring, summer and fall, but to me, that makes winter weddings even more special. There’s something about the dramatic build up to a winter wedding, as well as the different activities and design elements that can be incorporated that make them so unique. For a recent winter wedding, we created a magical outdoor winter welcome party the night before, complete with fire pits, festive lighting, night sledding, a live ice sculpture demonstration, hot drinks and fair food.
What’s one thing that’s worth spending extra money on? What’s something you can go cheap with?
The best-spent money is always on elements that benefit the entire group or overall success of the event, such as appropriate amount of waitstaff and bartenders, the correct tent size, heating or cooling and enough food. I like to help my clients create a priority list of ‘needs’ and ‘wants’ so they can budget for some of their fun but less imperative ‘wants’ while also covering their ‘needs.’
Recount a wedding mishap and how you handled it.
I had a wedding that was held on a family estate in a field far from any power sources, so everything was run by generator. A pretty intense storm passed though and the restroom trailer was hit by lightning, causing the motor to burn out. … I quickly called the company owner as well as a local electrician. Thankfully we had enough time to get the trailer working before guests arrived on property, but it could have been a huge issue if it wasn’t detected early.
How do you help a couple when each partner has a different vision for their wedding?
It’s most important for couples to have an open dialogue about what’s important to them and work through the pros and cons of different elements. Most of the time, common ground can be met by discussing what’s most important for both parties and finding a place in the middle.
How are weddings today different from what they were pre-pandemic?
I still have clients who prefer plated dinners to family style or communal sharing-of-platters types of dinner service. We also see more late and week-of-the-wedding declines from guests due to Covid exposure. We saw a lot of weekday weddings in the past few years as the backlog of weddings from the pandemic years had filled the 2021 and 2022 weekends. I also see that guests are even more happy to be able to attend, travel and celebrate after the limitations during the pandemic.
Samantha Sheehy of The Perfect Match Weddings
Manchester, theperfectmatchweddings.com
How did you get into the wedding business?
I’ve loved weddings since I was a little girl. The idea of dressing up, having all your family and friends in one place, eating awesome food and having beautiful flowers fascinated me. I’ve always had a knack for organization and connecting with people and realized wedding planning was the perfect combination of my creative side and Type A personality. I started out working for another wedding planner while working full-time in public relations. … Starting my own business seemed like it just made sense, and I wanted to see how I could have an impact on the wedding industry.
Describe one of your most memorable weddings.
Last summer we hosted a wedding in an airport hangar. The groom was a pilot. … The bride flew into the ceremony on a plane, and we transformed the airport hangar into a reception space.
What’s a fun wedding location people may not have considered?
Renting an Airbnb. This idea became popular during Covid since many venues were shut down. Some rules and regulations have changed through Airbnb since, but it’s such a cool way to have a place all to yourself for the weekend. … I would highly recommend hiring a wedding planner to help you navigate the logistics of a nontraditional location. You’ll need to bring in everything from tables to chairs, trash cans, lighting, linens, china and more.
Winter, spring, summer or fall wedding, and why?
Spring. This is an unpopular opinion being a New England wedding planner where everyone loves the fall foliage, but spring has the best flowers, it’s not too hot, and everyone’s excited to be outside again.
What’s one thing that’s worth spending extra money on? What’s something you can go cheap with?
When all is said and done, the only things you have left to remember your wedding are the photos and video. Many couples are tempted to hire a friend who’s a photographer on the side or to skip the videographer, but trust us on this one — you’ll regret it if you cut corners here. Think about how much time and money you put into making your wedding look beautiful. It’s important to have a professional there who knows how to properly capture this and tell the story of the day.
We suggest trying to cut costs on dessert. Don’t get me wrong, I love a good after-dinner sweet, but … guests are busy dancing, drinking and socializing, and dessert often gets wasted.
Recount a wedding mishap and how you handled it.
We’ve [handled] everything from restarting generators during power outages, getting stains out of shirts minutes before walking down the aisle, a groom with a sprained ankle, high winds threatening to knock down tents, blizzards and more. We show up on your wedding day with an emergency kit so we’re ready for anything. Our kit includes safety pins, stain removers, any over-the-counter medication you can think of, hair spray, scissors, lighters, fashion tape and more.
How do you help a couple when each partner has a different vision for their wedding?
There are so many decisions that need to be made throughout the wedding planning process … so when couples have differing opinions, there’s often an opportunity to include their idea in another part of the wedding. For example, if one partner wants the wedding to have an elegant feel but the other wants it to be more casual, we can compromise by having an elegant venue but fun and casual food choices such as a taco and mac and cheese bar.
How are weddings today different from what they were pre-pandemic?
The pandemic gave couples the excuse they needed to downsize their weddings and cut out the things that weren’t important to them. We see this trend continuing into 2023 and 2024, and it’s what we encourage all of our couples to do. If you don’t want to have a wedding party, don’t have one. If you don’t like cake, skip the cake and get doughnuts. This is your day, and just because something’s “traditional” doesn’t mean it has to be a part of your wedding.
Megan Thomson of Willow Tree Events
North Conway, willow-tree-events.com
How did you get into the wedding business?
After years of hosting my own events and being the go-to person to help my friends and family plan theirs, I decided 10 years ago to dive into the industry on my own. … My career is based on granting wishes, making the impossible possible and bringing people together. … The love I have for what I do is deeply rooted in me, and I could never do anything else.
Describe one of your most memorable weddings.
It was heartbreaking as a planner to go through month after month of canceled weddings [during the pandemic]. … The first big wedding we had after all the pandemic restrictions were lifted [included] a venue filled with smiling, hugging, dancing and singing people. I was overcome with so much relief and gratefulness for my couples to be able to have their day again. I’m not sure my eyes were dry all day.
What’s a fun wedding location people may not have considered?
I’m a lake and mountains kind of girl, so I suggest spots like Echo Lake, Cathedral Ledge and local breweries. Pull the outdoors into your day and find a spot where you have more freedom to do your own thing on your own time and not be tied down to restrictions and time limits.
Winter, spring, summer or fall wedding, and why?
All of the above. We live in New England after all. Winter for the quiet romance of it, spring for the new blooms, summer for the longer nights and fall because fall in New Hampshire is simply perfect.
What’s one thing that’s worth spending extra money on? What’s something you can go cheap with?
Never skimp on your entertainment, always add the extra hour of photography and go for the video. … If you’re looking to save, then skip the programs and Champagne toast.
How do you help a couple when each partner has a different vision for their wedding?
You talk it out, and, just like with marriage, compromise.
How are weddings today different from what they were pre-pandemic?
Higher RSVP counts and more multi-day celebrations. We all missed out on so much, and no one wants to waste time or miss a thing anymore.
Jennifer Matthews of Memorable Events
Keene, memorableeventsnh.com
How did you get into the wedding business?
When I was growing up, my parents owned a catering company. I also was a DJ when I was younger, so it was a natural transition. I’m headed into my 19th wedding season.
Describe one of your most memorable weddings.
This past wedding season, I did a really amazing four-day Indian wedding that was a huge undertaking and certainly one of the most memorable ones.
What’s a fun wedding location people may not have considered?
We’re so blessed in New Hampshire to have amazing venues [like] summer camps, lake and oceanfront venues and private estates tucked in the woods. I love when weddings are weekend-long celebrations at a venue that can house many or all of the guests.
Winter, spring, summer or fall wedding, and why?
It’s a personal preference. My schedule tends to be the most full in the fall because of the foliage, cooler evening temps and less bugs.
What’s one thing that’s worth spending extra money on? What’s something that you can go cheap with?
Photography is usually worth the splurge; the photos are what you’ll have left when the day is done. One area where I see a lot of people pulling back are extravagant favors; keep in mind that many could get left behind.
Recount a wedding mishap and how you handled it.
A caterer pulled out of a wedding just three days before. … Thankfully I was able to have a conversation with a catering company I’ve used several times, bring them up to speed, and they pulled together a miracle menu.
How do you help a couple when each partner has a different vision for their wedding?
I work with them to find middle ground or even lead them in a direction they may not have thought about that they both love.
How are weddings today different from what they were pre-pandemic?
By 2022 … weddings were back to ‘normal.’ But something non-pandemic-related I’m seeing a lot more of is couples including their dogs in the festivities, which I love.
Featured photo: Angela Marie Weddings. Courtesy photo.
