Author: John Fladd

Gingerbread

Gingerbread is strange.

Not the actual gingerbread itself but what people do with it. I can’t think of any baked good that people insist on making other things out of. We don’t make little eclair men with mischievous smiles, or build chocolate chip houses or hang brownies on trees as ornaments.

A number of people claim that they don’t like gingerbread when they’ve mostly had it as a flavor of tea, or an ingredient in ice cream, or baked hard and served as a cookie. I won’t say that everybody loves warm, moist gingerbread fresh from the oven, because we all know that there are people in the world with questionable taste, but I do question whether people who don’t like proper gingerbread are entirely trustworthy.

Here is a recipe adapted from King Arthur (kingarthurbaking.com).

Gingerbread

Dry ingredients:

  • 2 cups (240 grams) whole-wheat flour
  • ¼ cup (50 grams) sugar
  • 1 teaspoon baking soda – this will react with the acidic molasses and buttermilk
  • ½ teaspoon salt
  • 1½ teaspoons ground ginger
  • 1 teaspoon cinnamon
  • ¼ teaspoon nutmeg – it’s much better if you grind your own
  • ½ teaspoon ground cloves
  • ½ teaspoon black or cayenne pepper – Penzeys makes a blend called Black & Red that I like
  • ¾ cup (138 g) diced crystalized ginger

Wet ingredients:

  • 8 Tablespoons (one stick) butter, melted
  • ¾ cup (113 g) molasses
  • ¼ ginger beer – many recipes will call for cold, black coffee, but the extra kick of ginger brings more zing to the party
  • 1 egg
  • 1 cup (227) buttermilk

Preheat your oven to 350º. Line either a 9×9” or a 9×13” baking pan with parchment paper.

In a large bowl, combine all the dry ingredients.

In another bowl, combine all the wet ingredients.

Mix the contents of the two bowls together.

Pour into the prepped baking pan, then bake. If you are using a square baking pan, it will probably take 50 minutes or so to bake to the point where a toothpick comes out clean. The larger pan will probably take 30 to 35 minutes.

Let the gingerbread cool for half an hour before cutting and serving. It is excellent with whipped cream, vanilla ice cream or butter. If you are adventurous, try it smashed up in a bowl, topped with eggnog; you won’t be sorry.

Gingerbread is a cake that you don’t want to be too sweet. This version gets a little sweetness from the sugar, the crystalized ginger and the ginger beer, but mostly from the molasses. That adds a dark muskiness and a slightly bitter quality that complements the spices. This isn’t a celebration cake. It is a comfort cake to eat late in the afternoon, in the gathering dark, as the snow starts to fall. Eating it will bring a cat to sit in your lap, even if you don’t own a cat.

Featured photo: Gingerbread. Photo by John Fladd.

The useful gift

Kitchen presents you can buy

One or two labor-intensive sincere gifts are doable in a holiday season, but if you’re trying to come up with something nice for each night of Hanukkah, or good stocking stuffers for an entire family — who has time to knit all that? Plus, sometimes it’s just nice to get good stuff.

The following are some gifts you might consider for the serious cooks or drink-makers in your life. Most of them are reasonably priced stocking stuffers. At least one is a blowout extravagant gift. All of them are genuinely, how-did-I-ever-get-by-without-this, useful in the kitchen. Prices are approximate..

Microplane grater, about $1

If you’ve ever wondered how TV chefs manage to zest an orange without making their kitchen look like a war zone, or put fancy chocolate shavings on a cake, this is ho. This is a wood rasp that has been adapted for kitchen use. It is ideal for grating fresh nutmeg.

Silicone baking sheet, $10 to $15/pair

How would you like to never grease a baking sheet again? Silicone baking mats used to be imported from France and were mostly for Very Fancy People. Now they are really inexpensive and — dare I say it? — life-changing. Nothing sticks to these bad boys — not cookie dough or granola or even homemade peanut brittle. They last for years and are tough enough to stand up to any heat an oven can put out, though sadly not a charcoal grill, which I found out the hard way.

Oxo Steel Angled Measuring Jigger, $10

I own about a dozen jiggers for measuring ingredients for cocktails. It was only over time that I realized consciously that I have one that I keep coming back to, over and over. I’ll find myself interrupting a dishwasher cycle to fish it out, rather than use a different, perfectly fine jigger in the cabinet in front of me. This Oxo jigger is angled to allow you to see exactly how much you are measuring to within a fraction of a fluid ounce, without having to crouch down to eye level. And it has a spout. It adds a little element of precision and elegance to your drink making.

Reconditioned blender — Vitamix, BlendTec, etc., around $300

By far, the most useful kitchen tool I use on a weekly or often daily basis is a good blender. It makes smoothies and shakes of course, but also hummus, whipped cream, pie fillings and even ice cream. A top-of-the-line blender can set you back $700 to $800, but the high-end manufacturers often sell reconditioned used models. Mine is a reconditioned red Vitamix named Steve, who is pretty frustrated at how seldom I use his very highest setting, which I suspect could turn a chair leg into bark mulch.

2 in 1 stainless steel whisk egg beater & instant thermometer, $15 to $20

I don’t know if you’ve ever been stirring something on the stove, waiting for it to hit a very particular temperature. For several years I found myself thinking that someone should invent a whisk with an integrated thermometer, before I actually thought to check online to see if anyone had. They had.

Digital kitchen scale, $25 to $30

Every time I save a recipe I convert the amounts from cups to grams. It makes my baking more accurate, and I can add ingredients directly to the pan or bowl and tare (zero) out how much weight I already have in it. An inexpensive digital scale will measure in several different units — grams, ounces, etc. — and is accurate to a tenth of a gram. It will last for years of robust cooking and make you look like a badass in the kitchen.

Featured photo: Silicone baking sheets

Homemade, delicious

Gifts for when you’ve run out of gift ideas

Not to blow my own horn, but I am an excellent gift-giver. I am thoughtful, I listen carefully when people tell me what kind of things they like and what their favorite memories are. I’m creative. Probably eight out of 10 times, I knock it out of the park.

I realize this makes me something of an outlier; most people have one or possibly two solid gift ideas in a given holiday season, then they find themselves emotionally exhausted. If you are feeling a little gassed-out creativity-wise this holiday season, here are two suggestions for food and drink gifts that are affordable and quirky and probably won’t be put into a closet somewhere.

Geographic cookies

You have probably never thought too much about cookie cutters, but you can buy them in almost any shape, including any state or province you can name.

Manitoba? Boom! Six dollars on Etsy. West Virginia? Shazam! $7.99 on Amazon.

You know that lady at work who’s really nice, but you don’t really know anything about her, except that she grew up in Toledo? Give her a plate of Ohio sugar cookies, with a mini-M&Ms glued more or less in the area of Toledo with melted chocolate. Did your family go on vacation in Chicago this summer? You can get the state of Illinois, or the skyline of the city.

Thoughtful, edible, and you’ll only be out a couple of hours of your time and maybe $10.

Roll-Out Sugar Cookies

Based on the King Arthur Roll-Out Sugar Cookies recipe, available at kingarthurbaking.com, which they credit to blogger Amanda Rettke. (As opposed to the several other sugar cookie and sugar cookie-adjacent recipes they have; baking for someone gluten-free or paleo? They have that too). It’s a very large recipe — three sticks of butter, five cups of flour — and I like that it has many of the ingredients listed in grams as well as cups. I halved it, made a batch of cookies to share at work and still have dough in reserve. The original recipe calls for 2 teaspoons of almond extract, but I have replaced that with Fiori di Sicilia, a King Arthur flavoring they describe as having bright citrus and warm vanilla flavors and that makes the cookies taste like a creamsicle. Be careful with the measuring; I spoke to a King Arthur recipe developer months back and she said too heavy a hand with Fiori Di Sicilia will make everything taste like perfume.

  • 12 Tablespoons (170 grams) unsalted butter, room temperature
  • 1 cup (198.5 grams) of granulated sugar
  • 1 large egg plus 1 egg yolk
  • 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
  • 1 teaspoon King Arthur Fiori di Sicilia
  • 2½ cups (300 grams) all-purpose flour
  • ½ teaspoon salt
  • ½ teaspoon baking powder

Beat the butter and sugar until light and fluffy. Add the egg and yolk one at a time, beating after each addition.

Slowly add the extracts (with the mixer on low) and mix until combined, scraping down the sides and bottom of the bowl.

Sift together flour, salt and baking powder.

With the mixer on low, slowly add to the butter mixture and mix until just combined.

Wrap the dough in plastic wrap and chill for at least 2 hours (or overnight).

Preheat the oven to 325 degrees and line baking sheets with parchment.

Roll out dough to 1/4 inch thick and cut out cookies. Place on parchment-lined baking sheet.

Bake for 10 to 12 minutes, until they start to turn golden on the edges and the center doesn’t look moist.

Bottle of pre-mixed cocktails

Depending on whom you’re giving it to, booze is always a good call.

Find a nice bottle. It could even be an empty liquor bottle that you were about to put in the recycling. Wash it out and remove the label.

If it’s a paper label, soak the bottle in hot water and scrape the label off with the back of a butter knife. If there’s any glue residue left behind, a citrus-based cleaner like Goof-Off will take care of it. Martha Stewart suggests using a hair dryer to soften the glue. Once, I had a really nice bottle but the label had actually been painted on. I soaked it in vinegar overnight, and it came right off. I imagine nail-polish remover would do the same thing.

Before you remove the label, write down how big the bottle is ― how many fluid ounces or milliliters.

Find a cocktail recipe that you think your friend would like ― A Peanut Butter and Jelly Sour, for instance:

  • 2 ounces Skrewball Peanut Butter Whiskey
  • 3 ounces Manischewitz Concord Grape Wine
  • 1 ounces fresh squeezed lemon juice

Normally you would shake this over ice, then pour it into a glass and drink it. But this time we’re going to do some math. (Don’t worry ― there aren’t any exponents or variables involved.)

How many ounces of ingredients go into one drink? 3+3+1=5. Five ounces.

Remember your empty liquor bottle? How much did it hold? I’ll bet it was 750 milliliters, wasn’t it? That’s equal to about 25 fluid ounces, or five PB&J Sours. Multiply everything by five (10 ounces, 15 ounces and 5 ounces) and use a funnel to pour it into your nice bottle. Screw the cap on ― or put a cork in it, if you’re fancy ― give it a shake, and you’re off the hook present-wise for another year. You don’t even have to wrap it ― just write a tag and tie it on with rough twine, and you’ll look classy.

Ideally the recipient will ask you to stay and drink it with them. And maybe eat some cookies.

Featured photo: NH sugar cookies. Photo by John Fladd.

Character Reference

I’m not certain what’s been going on with my dreams lately.

I’m generally a heavy dreamer — most nights will have two or three — but I tend to have a particular menu:

• The one where I’m late for something and it takes me a distressingly long time to pack my suitcase. The longer I look, the more laundry is spread across the floor, most of it mismatched socks.

• The one where I break into the house of somebody I used to know 20 years ago and look for someplace to take a nap.

• The restaurant with a dishwashing area the size of a warehouse, and they start turning the lights off before I’m done with the dishes.

• The one in the world’s largest hotel, with a fantastic view of the ocean.

But for the past week or so, I’ve been having a whopper at some point during the night that is unusually crisp and to the point. It’s almost like one of those TV shows where people accidentally have each other’s dreams.

Last Wednesday, apparently Dream Me got blackout drunk and behaved very badly. The whole dream was different friends and acquaintances filling me in on how much I had disgraced myself. Interestingly, my Dream Friends were not much more responsible than I was:

“You let me DRIVE!!?”

“Well, we weren’t going to miss this!”

Normally I would probably be bothered by this and wonder what was going on with my subconscious, but the night before, I had led a revolution in Polynesia against a supernatural regime, armed with a bar of soap. Soap might not seem like a very effective tool for social change, but my followers were very inspired by it.

Last night, I was involved in a competition between superhero colleges. Students from competing schools kept asking what my superpower was. I’d tell them to slap me as hard as they could, and they’d start to, but something huge and distracting would happen. Finally, one of the other students put together that my superpower was Dodging Fate.

Which is to say, the more I try to figure out what message my brain is trying to send me, the more I need a drink.

Here is a seasonal one that is delicious and fairly straightforward. I wrote a story a few years ago about a girl who was trying to scam her way into a Cranberry Queen beauty pageant. It is called:

The Character Reference

As we all know, character references are, by their nature, deceptive. So is this drink.

  • 2 ounces vodka – this is a good job for Tito’s
  • 1½ ounces triple sec
  • 3 ounces unsweetened cranberry juice
  • seltzer to top, ~3 ounces

Shake the vodka, triple sec and cranberry juice with ice, and strain into a tall glass.

Top with seltzer, and stir gently.

Garnish with an orange wedge and a straw.

This is a lovely, light-tasting highball that, like most character references, neglects to tell you its whole story. Cranberry and orange are another classic combination. The vodka plays its part behind the scenes and will look over its shoulder saying, “Who? Me?” if you go looking for it. Keep in mind, though, that this has three and a half ounces of alcohol in it.

This is an excellent holiday party drink — it looks so lovely that other party guests are likely to ask for a sip, then ask for one of their own. After several people have had several of these, the conversations will get significantly more interesting.

As will your dreams

Featured photo: Character reference. Photo by John Fladd.

Spice cookies

Things you probably didn’t know about your spices:

(1) They probably taste like sawdust. Did you know you’re supposed to replace them? Whole spices like whole nutmeg or cinnamon sticks can probably last a year or two, but ground spices have a shelf life of about six months. Baking powder and baking soda should be replaced twice a year, too. Date all these when you buy them, so you remember how old they are.

(2) Most spices are way better when you grind them yourself. Buy a very cheap coffee grinder and set it aside for things like cumin, cloves, coriander and allspice. Use a micro- plane grater or the tiny-hole side of your box grater for nutmeg. (Seriously, grate some fresh nutmeg and smell it. It will be a revelation.)

(3) Some spices would probably be better if you ground them yourself, but are too much trouble: cinnamon, cardamom seeds, dried ginger and cayenne pepper.

(4) Small containers of spices at the supermarket are startlingly expensive, but if you buy them from an Indian market, a two-pound bag will cost less than the coffee you bought on your drive there. But then you end up with way more cumin or poppy seeds than you can possibly use before they hit that one-year mark.

(5) If at all possible, store your spices on their sides in a drawer, instead of a cabinet. They have a way of migrating to the back of a cabinet, and if you’ve put them on a high shelf, you will forget that you ever bought them. They’ll hang out with that bottle of vegan Worcestershire sauce and the dip mix you bought at that gift shop that time, having sad conversations in a sort of all-spice production of The Velveteen Rabbit.

(6) Every once in a while, bake something that uses a lot of different spices.

  • 2 cups (212 grams) rye flour
  • 1 teaspoon baking soda
  • ½ teaspoon salt
  • 2 teaspoons ground ginger
  • ¾ teaspoon black pepper
  • ¼ teaspoon cayenne pepper – ½ teaspoon if you are stout of heart
  • ½ teaspoon cinnamon
  • ½ teaspoon ground cardamom
  • ¾ cup (149 grams) white sugar
  • ½ cup (99 grams) vegetable oil
  • 1 egg
  • ¼ cup (85 grams) molasses
  • About 1/3 cup of sugar to coat the cookies

Heat the oven to 325º.

Combine all the dry ingredients — the rye flour, salt, spices and baking soda. I don’t know why sugar is treated as a wet ingredient, but it is. It’s just one of those unanswerable mysteries.

Whisk the oil and sugar together, then add the egg. It should pull together into a rough batter.

Mix in the molasses, then the dry ingredients.

Using a tiny ice cream scoop or a spoon, roll the dough into 1½-inch balls, then roll them around in the sugar.

Place them on a baking sheet with a silicone baking mat or a piece of parchment paper, about 2 inches apart. This will probably take two baking sheets.

Bake for about 15 minutes. If your oven runs hot, it might take a little less time, and longer if it runs a little cool. If it’s like mine, you can never be certain what it will do, so you should probably start checking on the cookies at 12 minutes.

Let the cookies cool on the tray.

Not only do these spice cookies taste good; they are a confidence-booster. They come out very round and crinkly. These might be the most professional-looking cookies you bake this year. The rye flour and the molasses deepen the flavor and provide a bass note to the spices.

Could you play around and replace some of the spices? Probably. I’ve made these with smoked cinnamon and they were pretty good. Ground cloves might be another way to add some zing.

You’d be rolling the dust by grinding caraway seeds and using them, but now that I just thought of it, I’m going to try it.

This is a good dress rehearsal for the holidays and makes you inventory your spice drawer.

Featured photo: Spice cookies. Photo by John Fladd.

El Diablo

This is a classic tequila drink.

This time, I’ve substituted mezcal for tequila, because I have a really nice bottle of Siete Misterios that is making me very happy. Mezcal is in the same family as tequila and works nicely in this particular cocktail. In place of the traditional crème de cassis, I’ve used sloe gin. All of this is slightly beside the point, because the star player here, the lynchpin that holds everything together and keeps it from dissolving into a puddle of entropy, is the ginger beer.

If you are new to the world of ginger beer, you could be forgiven for supposing that it is more or less the same as ginger ale. “Beer/ale,” you might say to yourself, “Tomato/tomahto.”

This would be a mistake.

Ginger ale is what your mom brought you when you were sick, to help calm your stomach. It’s what you drink when you want a soda that doesn’t make any demands on you. It might be lovely, but it will always be mild and unassuming. That’s sort of its whole point.

A good ginger beer, on the other hand, is anything but mild. If you ever popped open a bottle of ginger beer thinking it was ginger ale and took a big gulp of it to cure your hiccups, you’d definitely get rid of them, and maybe make your heart seize up for a second.

Ginger beer is all about the ginger.

“OK,” I hear you say, “I like ginger snaps and gingerbread; I really don’t think this is a big deal.”

All right, the next time you go to a juice bar, ask the juice barista (or whatever the technical name for a juice jockey is) to give you a straight shot of ginger juice. She will raise her eyebrow but will do her thing behind the counter and hand you a shot glass with a milky, beige liquid in it. Don’t sip it. Throw that baby down your throat.

It will change your point of view so profoundly that you might quit your job and become a matador. (It’s delicious and very spicy.)

Really good Caribbean ginger beers will often add a little cayenne to intensify the experience a little bit. Do yourself a favor and go to a bodega and pick up a couple bottles of the good stuff for this drink. You’ll be glad you did.

1½ ounces good tequila or mezcal – right now I’m really enjoying Siete Misterios

½ ounce sloe gin

½ ounce fresh squeezed lime juice

3 to 4 ounces excellent ginger beer

Mix the mezcal, lime juice and sloe gin in a cocktail shaker with ice.

Shake for about 30 seconds, then strain into a Collins glass, over fresh ice.

Top off with excellent, just opened ginger beer. Stir with a chopstick.

The ginger beer really is the star of this show, with the mezcal or tequila playing a strong supporting role. The spiciness of the ginger stands up to the smokiness and bite of the tequila. The lime juice brings the acidity that this combination needs. The sloe gin adds color and the faintest hint of fruitiness.

This is the drink that you would be drinking all the time, if you had made some different life choices at a couple of critical times in your youth.

John Fladd is a veteran Hippo writer, a father, writer and cocktail enthusiast, living in New Hampshire.

Featured photo: El Diablo. Photo by John Fladd.

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