I know I’m not the first person to point this out, but the original versions of a lot of nursery rhymes and fairytales were pretty brutal. In the original version of Little Red Riding Hood, the story ends with the wolf eating her. Ring Around the Rosie is about Continue reading “Too many thorns”
Author: John Fladd
The Musketeer
In my youth, in the late 18th century, I watched a television show about stunt performers. One of the things that stuck with me was a stunt man getting ready to be thrown off a roof, and after going over all his safety protocols, the last thing he did before Continue reading “The Musketeer”
Sloe gin fizz
I opened the door to the back seat of my car and went to put my briefcase in but saw something out of the corner of my eye and stopped short.
A couple of times a week, when I stop at the convenience store to pick up some iced coffee, Continue reading “Sloe gin fizz”
Blood orange tequila fizz
I read a lot of travel books — mostly written by confused, bumbling Europeans trying to make sense of life in unfamiliar cultures. I think I like them because I generally feel confused, bumbling around in all cultures.
“Bon jour, mon frère,” someone says to the writer of one of Continue reading “Blood orange tequila fizz”
PB & J
An adventure with the classic combination of peanut butter and jelly
Typically I would try to start an article on peanut butter and jelly with some sort of hook, like a story about how a Japanese princess drove off 15 ninjas with a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, or how Continue reading “PB & J”
Pea-ña Colada
Spring means a lot of different things to different people:
Flowers
Mud
Taxes
Bunnies
Spring Break
When I was a college student, back in the Late Cretaceous, I had strong feelings about Spring Break. I had heard the stories about 24-hour beach parties, bacchanalian excess and overcrowded hotel rooms. I Continue reading “Pea-ña Colada”
The thrill-seeker’s drink
It was my bragging that brought on my most recent identity crisis.
It was Monday morning, and someone asked what I had done over the weekend. Instead of using one of the responses recommended in the official small talk manual — “You know, same ol’ same ol’” or “Not much; Continue reading “The thrill-seeker’s drink”
The remedy for February
“Hi,” the lady in the apron says to me.
I look up from a pile of tangerines. “Hey. How are you?”
“I’m good. You?”
I fall back on my stock answer when I don’t really want to think too much about how I actually am: “You know how it is Continue reading “The remedy for February”
Zelda and the bison grass
I know that I don’t need to remind you of it, but Feb. 2 is National Tater Tot Day. I’m sure you’ve already put up the decorations and picked out your outfit, but I’m afraid I’m going to have to weasel out on you.
I was going to develop a Continue reading “Zelda and the bison grass”
Squeeze & punch
How to squeeze a lime
(Or a lemon, or an orange, or a tangerine, but limes lend themselves to being squeezed; they have the fewest inhibitions of any citrus fruit.)
Method 1 – Pure brute strength
Wash your hands.
Carefully place the lime on a cutting board in front of Continue reading “Squeeze & punch”