This is not an authentic Mardi Gras King Cake. An actual New Orleanian would sneer at this hard enough to sprain her lip. But a real King Cake is actually a member of the bread family and takes about five hours to make. This is a delicious, dense, moist almond cake that will serve you in good stead.
Cake
- 2½ cups (300 grams) all-purpose flour
- ½ teaspoon salt
- ¾ teaspoon baking powder
- ¾ cup (162 grams) whole milk
- ½ cup (120 grams) sour cream
- 2¼ cups (450 grams) sugar
- 7 ounces (1 tube) almond paste – you can find this in the baking/spices section of your supermarket
- 2 teaspoons orange zest – the zest of one large orange
- 1 8-ounce package cream cheese
- 4 eggs
- 3 Tablespoon (45 grams) amaretto
- ¼ teaspoon almond extract
Glaze
- 2 cups (227 grams) powdered sugar
- 1 teaspoon almond extract
- pinch salt
- 2 to 3 Tablespoons milk – enough to make a spoonable glaze
Garnish
- Gold, purple, and green sprinkles or sanding sugar – you can find these online or at a craft store
A small plastic baby that you will bake into the cake for luck. You might or might not actually have a small plastic baby to hand. If you do not, you can substitute some other small non-poisonous object in its place, such as a foreign coin, a marble, or one of those small ceramic figures that are sometimes included in boxes of tea.
Bring all the cake ingredients to room temperature. This recipe will work if the cream cheese and almond paste are cold, but they will be temperamental and will require some persuasion to blend together gracefully.
Preheat your oven to 350ºF. Prepare a large Bundt pan — I brush the inside with a mixture of equal parts shortening, vegetable oil and flour.
In a medium bowl, combine the dry ingredients — the flour, salt and baking powder. Set aside.
In a jar or measuring cup, combine the milk and sour cream. Set aside.
In a stand mixer, or using a hand-held electric mixer, combine the almond paste — cut into small pieces — and the sugar. Mix at slow speed; the mixture looks like damp sand. If you do not cut the almond paste into small pieces, it will fight against its fate and throw plumes of sugar out of your mixing bowl in protest. If this starts happening, cover the bowl with a tea towel and be careful that it doesn’t get sucked up into the beaters.
Add the orange zest and cream cheese. Mix to combine. Again, this will go more smoothly if the cream cheese is at room temperature.
Mix in the eggs, one at a time, then add the amaretto and almond extract. Scrape down the sides of the bowl if you need to. Once everything is thoroughly mixed, beat at a higher speed, until the proto-batter is a little fluffy.
Add the dry ingredients and the milk/sour cream mixture a little at a time, alternating between the two, until the batter is smooth and battery.
Pour half the batter into the prepared Bundt pan, which has been patiently waiting for you.
Drop your small plastic baby into the Bundt pan. “Godspeed, my friend,” would be a good sentiment to express at this point. Extra points if you say it in French.
Pour the rest of the batter into the pan, covering your Cake Baby.
Bake for 50 to 60 minutes, until a toothpick comes out clean or it reaches an internal temperature of 200ºF.
Cool on a rack for 20 minutes before inverting onto a plate. Let it cool thoroughly before glazing and decorating it. Decorate a third of the cake in each of the colors of sugar or sprinkles. This is not a time to exercise restraint. “Garish” should be the absolute minimum level of decoration you are looking for.
This is a first-class snack cake. It is meant to be shared. A traditional King Cake is supposed to be eaten with friends. Whoever finds the baby in their slice is supposed to host the Mardi Gras party the following year. You should feel free to set the stakes to work with your particular group of friends, relatives, or co-workers.
Laissez les bon temps rouler!
Featured photo: Not King cake. Photo by John Fladd.
