Author Paul Brogan discusses new book
By Delaney Beaudoin
Paul Brogan became pen pals with Doris Day at just 8 years old. After viewing the 1960 comedy Please Don’t Eat the Daisies, starring Doris Day as a mother of four, at a drive-in movie theater with his parents, Brogan wrote a fan letter addressed simply to “Doris Day, Hollywood, California.”
“I just thought as a little boy, oh, she is the most wonderful mother. In my fan letter, I said, ‘Miss Day, if I didn’t have my own mother, I’d love to have you,’” Brogan said. “And she wrote back. And she said it was the sweetest fan letter she had ever gotten. And she said, please stay in touch. And she sent me her home address.”
Despite Brogan’s early desires to travel to tinsel town and pursue a career in screenplay writing, Doris Day remained Brogan’s only connection to Hollywood and his dream of writing for the majority of his life.
Brogan, who now lives in Concord with his spouse, Alan, will be at Gibson’s Bookstore on Thursday, June 30, at 6:30 p.m., to discuss his third and latest book, A Sprinkling of Stardust Over the Outhouse: Musings, Memories, Madness, and Pillow Talk! The book retells the trajectory of Brogan’s life and the lessons he’s had to learn for himself about the importance of being true to yourself, even in the face of hardship.
“This time I returned to a topic I sort of know: myself,” Brogan said. “When you’re in your late 60s, you start to realize that life is finite, you’re not going to live forever. And if there is a philosophy, or something that you feel should be shared, that other people might either benefit from or just be entertained from sharing it, that it’s the time to do it.”
Brogan’s whirlwind of a life, which began with growing up gay and Catholic in the 1950s and ’60s, took many twists and turns as the author slowly began to realize the key to happiness is listening to your own desires and wants, rather than the ones others impress upon you.
“Growing up, I was told, well, you can’t go to Hollywood, Paul, you’re not good-looking enough. And I would say, but I don’t want to be in the movies, I want to write, I want to do something. And they would say, Oh, you’re not a very good writer, so don’t, don’t follow that, you’re only going to be disappointed when you fail,” said Brogan.
Despite others’ doubt, Brogan did eventually make it to Hollywood, where he met Doris Day in her home in 1973. Their friendship would persist through the duration of her life.
In his life, Brogan made many career changes in his pursuit of happiness. Originally working traditional jobs for many years made Brogan realize his dissatisfaction with the path laid out for him.
“I was basically in the era where I thought, Paul, you need to find a nice job. Stick with it for 40 years; when you retire they’ll give you a gold watch and a pension. And these crazy ideas you have about wanting to be a writer or go to Hollywood, that’s all up in your head. And it’s just not realistic,” he said.
Day continued to act as a mentor for Brogan, who in the mid-’80s suffered a mental breakdown caused by his unfulfillment in daily life.
“She said to me, Paul, right now, you’re at a juncture in your life, you need the ocean, you need the calming sea,” Brogan said.
Brogan heeded Day’s advice and moved up to Ogunquit, Maine, shortly after, where he took up a job playing piano at a restaurant.
“I’ve been playing piano since I was 5, but I’d never done it professionally. So the ocean and everything helped to give me a whole new perspective on what had value and what mattered. And that I had to stop listening to other people’s concepts of what I was supposed to be or do, and that I had to find my own niche,” he said.
Brogan would go on to work in the nonprofit sector, helping people who were “infected and affected” at the height of the HIV/AIDS epidemic. Eventually, Brogan fulfilled his lifelong dream of becoming a writer, just not in the guise of the silver screen as he originally imagined.
“I was in my 50s when I wrote the first book 11 years ago, the first time I really dipped my toe in the water, so to speak, and said I’m finally going to do this. I talked about it when I was 15 and 16…. When the book became successfulI said, wow, it’s nice in your late 60s to be able to call yourself a writer.”
The unique title, which interestingly enough Brogan developed before writing the book, refers to a commonly used phrase.
“Pardon me, sh*t happens…. In the book, I basically say, yeah, that’s gonna happen, but you don’t dwell on it and make that your mantra in life. You put that crap into the outhouse, where it belongs, and forget about it. And just to make sure, just sprinkle some stardust — your hopes, your dreams, the next chapter of your life — over the outhouse. Then you’re able to move on to whatever is the next thing that’s in store for you,” Brogan said.
Paul Brogan Presents at Gibson’s Bookstore
Where: Gibson’s Bookstore, 45 S. Main St., Concord
When: Thursday, June 30, at 6:30 p.m.
Visit: gibsonsbookstore.com
Featured photo: Paul and Doris Day in Beverly Hills. Photo courtesy of Paul Brogan.