Mary Sargent is a certified family mediator based in Bedford.
Explain your job and what it entails.
The conflicts I mediate are largely divorce and parenting [issues]. … I help parties dispute and negotiate toward agreements by facilitating healthy, productive conversation that may or may not [end in] an agreement. I make sure that people are hearing and understanding each other, and that they have all the information they need to make a decision. Then, I help them put [their decision] in whatever form is needed, whether it’s a court order or a contract or a simple agreement.
How long have you had this job?
Twelve years.
What led you to this career field and your current job?
Over the years, I’ve held a lot of different positions within family work — Child Protective Services worker, guardian ad litem, case manager — and at the core of all of those positions is identifying areas of problems, disputes and conflicts. … I was seeing a lot of people in a lot of pain because they were trying so hard to avoid an issue when what they really needed to do was resolve the issue. … I realized that mediation allows an opportunity to address a problem head-on … and really drill down to the heart of it, rather than trying to avoid, deny or work around it.
What kind of education or training did you need?
I have a bachelor’s degree, and I’ve had extensive training through certificate programs. In New Hampshire, you have to go through a certification class and an internship to [become certified].
What is your typical at-work uniform or attire?
Business casual.
How has your job changed over the last year?
Prior to Covid, the very idea of doing [mediation] remotely was controversial, industry-wide … but, ultimately, we were forced into it, and I do the vast majority of my work remotely. I’ve found that it actually solves more problems than it creates. It can be difficult for people who are in conflict with one another to sit at a table in the same room. It’s a little easier for them and mitigates some of the anticipatory anxiety if they can be in the comfort of their own home where they aren’t in close physical proximity to each other.
What do you wish you’d known at the beginning of your career?
How hard it would be and how long it would take to build a practice and make a name for myself. A lot of people didn’t even know what mediation was, so getting them to buy into mediation, and then to find me [was hard].
What do you wish other people knew about your job?
Mediators don’t make decisions. … A lot of times people come to me and say, ‘We need your help in deciding what is fair,’ and I tell them, ‘I have no idea.’ We can guide people … [in having] a productive conversation, but we can’t determine what is or isn’t fair for them. The fair and equitable [outcome] is whatever they agree on as being fair and equitable.
What was the first job you ever had?
Summer camp counselor.
What’s the best piece of work-related advice you’ve ever received?
Be mindful of the present, and assume there’s space for an agreement, even if you don’t know what that looks like yet.
Five favorites Favorite book: To Kill a Mockingbird Favorite movie: The Birdcage Favorite music: Showtunes Favorite food: Pizza Favorite thing about NH: Lake Winnipesaukee
Dear Donna, I found this small horse charm and it says “Black Horse Ale NY.” It’s only 1 1/2” x 1” and is made of plastic. Can you give me any information and a possible value?
Lynne
Dear Lynne, I did some research on your horse charm and found out it was an advertising charm for Black Horse Ale. The story is a very interesting one but a long one as well; if you’ve got the time I would encourage you to do some research online to read the story of Black Horse Ale and see how one tiny plastic charm has such a history.
The interesting thing to me about this charm, and other small collectibles, is how did such a tiny piece even survive to today?
The value on it is in the $25 range but the history is priceless. I know that collecting charms from gum machines, cereals, Cracker Jack and premiums is still happening today. What’s amazing is how many old ones are still out there and the stories that go behind them.
It’s spring, and insects are hatching, flying and munching. Contrary to what you may think, most are not a problem for your garden. There are over a million named insect species and many — perhaps most — coevolved with flowering plants. They pollinate our crops and do many wonderful things for us.
One of the most hated insects is the Japanese beetle. These beetles, as the name suggests, are originally from Japan and were first observed in New Jersey in 1916. In just over 100 years they have become omnipresent in the eastern United States. Why? They have very few natural predators — even birds don’t want to eat them.
As larvae these pests generally live in lawns, feeding on grass roots. They are whitish grubs of various sizes but up to an inch long. If you cut open a square foot of lawn with a sharp shovel and peel back the sod, you are likely to see a grub or two. If you count 10 or more in that sample, you have an infestation that will be a problem.
The U.S. Department of Agriculture developed a remedy in the 1940s called milky spore, which is a bacterium that can be suspended in water and sprayed on lawns. It is not a miracle cure and is quite expensive. Not all entomologists believe that milky spore is an effective cure, at least not in New England, where cold winters can kill the bacterium.
Not only that, those darn Japanese beetles fly. So you can treat your lawn with milky spore only to have your neighbor’s beetles fly over the fence to attack your roses. I did talk to an enterprising gardener once who convinced her neighbors to treat, too, and she feels it made a significant reduction in beetle numbers.
What else can you do? There are beneficial nematodes (unsegmented worms) called Hb nematodes that will attack Japanese beetle larvae and are said to be 96 percent effective in eliminating Japanese beetle and rose chafer larvae if applied properly. The best time to apply these nematodes is July and August, when the grubs are feeding in your lawn. If you buy them, follow the directions carefully: They need to be applied to moist lawn at dusk and then watered in. These are live worms, and as such need to be used soon after purchase. They are not generally available at garden centers, but are available online.
What about those Japanese beetle traps? Give them to neighbors you don’t like. They attract lots of beetles but only capture some — so they attract more hungry beetles to your property if you use them. Really, just don’t buy them.
I am a firm believer that the best method of insect control for most bad bugs is hand-picking them and dropping in soapy water. Insects often have several life cycles in a summer, so try to reduce numbers before they reproduce.
Hand-picking works for potato bugs, for example, if you check your plants early in the season, before large numbers have appeared. Look under the leaves: if you see orange egg masses, scrape them off and drown them in soapy water, along with the beetles and larvae. If you grow too many potatoes for hand-picking bugs, try something called “Bt”, another beneficial bacterium. It is readily available at garden centers. It does not act as a contact poison, but sickens the larvae so they stop feeding and don’t reach adulthood.
My insect nemesis is the striped cucumber beetle. It is a small striped beetle that can devour an entire small plant in one night. It eats not only cucumber leaves, but anything in that family including squashes and pumpkins. I do two things to help prevent their destruction: I grow my seedlings in pots until they have three or four leaves so the beetles can’t kill the plant in one night. And I cover my plants with row covers (breathable garden fabric) to physically keep those darn beetles off the leaves. Which is not to say that they can’t come up under the covers through the soil, but the method does help. And when the blossoms come, I’ll have to remove the row covers to allow pollination.
Can you create habitat for beneficial insects? Sure. Don’t manicure every inch of your garden. Leave a few dead branches or decomposing flower stems in piles at the edge of your property. Allow fallen leaves to serve as mulch. Consider putting up a simple structure for solitary wasps (such as those that control those pesky tomato hornworms). They are sold next to the birdhouses at the garden center.
I’m afraid that mosquitoes, black flies and deer ticks have given all insects a bad name, but most are beneficial. They pollinate, serve as food for baby birds, they help to keep vigorous plants and other insects from taking over. And please remember this: If you decide that spraying pesticides is easier than the organic methods described here, know that those same sprays will kill small beneficial insects that you probably never even notice.
Featured photo: Catch Japanese beetles with a milk jug and soapy water. Courtesy photo.
The tipi set up at Mt. Kearsarge Indian Museum. Courtesy photo.
Virtual field trips
Watch on-stage performances of Pete the Cat, Dog Man the Musical, We the People: America Rocks and other kid-friendly shows as part of the Theaterworks USA Virtual Field Trip series, available through the Capitol Center for the Arts’ website (ccanh.com). The series was created for schools, home-schooled children and families. Non-school groups can purchase tickets through theaterworksusa.uscreen.io, where there is a full list of productions that are available for in-home rentals. Most shows are $20 per household, and once purchased they are available to view for 48 hours.
Free fun for military families
The Children’s Museum of New Hampshire (6 Washington St. in Dover; children’s-museum.org, 742-2002) kicks off its Military Appreciation Summer on Armed Forces Day, Saturday, May 15, allowing all current and retired military personnel and their immediate family members free admission. From this Saturday through Sunday, Sept. 5, military members with an ID will receive free admission, plus free admission for dependent children and spouse — up to five family members. The museum’s current hours are Wednesdays and Sundays from 9 to 11:30 a.m., Thursdays, Fridays and Saturdays from 9 to 11:30 a.m. or 1 to 3:30 p.m., and reservations are required. Admission is $9 per person ages 3 and up.
Explore Native cultures
The Mt. Kearsarge Indian Museum in Warner (18 Highlawn Road, 456-2600, indianmuseum.org) is now open for the season, offering self-guided tours Monday through Saturday from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. and Sunday from noon to 4 p.m. The museum features exhibits that explore Native cultures and encourage respect for nature, including historical and contemporary crafts and customs. Two new exhibits are a scenic mural in the Northeast Region and an 1800s Cree man’s outfit from the Plains Region. Outside, the Medicine Woods Trail features native plants that were commonly used for food, medicine and shelter, the Janeway Arboretum includes 85 species of trees, and there are 20 new birdhouses throughout the property. The cost of admission is $9 for adults, $8 for seniors and students, $7 for kids ages 6 through 12, free for kids under 6 and Native Americans, and $26 for families of two adults and children under 18.
Featured photo: The tipi set up at Mt. Kearsarge Indian Museum. Courtesy photo.
Youth artwork celebrates Mental Health Awareness Month
New Hampshire youth speak out about mental health through art at the Magnify Voices Expressive Arts Contest Celebration, happening Thursday, May 20, at the Tupelo Drive-In in Derry and virtually via livestream.
Now in its third year, the contest invites middle school and high school students in the state to submit an original work of art — be it a two- or three-dimensional visual art piece, short film, essay, poem or song — that expresses their experience with or observations of mental health. The art work is then featured at a celebratory event in May to honor Mental Health Awareness Month and to highlight the need for improved children’s mental health care in New Hampshire.
“I think being able to see what our kids are experiencing in this very visual way can really help us get a better understanding of what they’re going through,” said Michele Watson, family network coordinator for the National Alliance on Mental Illness New Hampshire Chapter, which co-sponsors the event with the New Hampshire Office of the Child Advocate and other mental health- and youth-focused organizations throughout the state.
Upon arrival attendees will be guided to distanced parking spaces. For the first hour of the event, from 4 to 5 p.m., they will be able to stroll the parking lot, masked, and visit information booths for around a dozen local organizations involved with youth mental health.
“Part of bringing [mental health] awareness is letting people know where they can go for resources,” Watson said. “We want to make sure that, if they ever need help, or if they have a family member or good friend who might need help, they know where to go.”
Also during that time, all 43 art pieces that were submitted will be displayed on a large screen near the stage. They consist mostly of visual art pieces, Watson said, including drawings, paintings and computer-generated images, with a few short films and poems in the mix.
“The art work just completely impresses us,” she said, “and not just because of the messages that they share but also because of the quality of the art work. A lot of [the artists] are extremely talented.”
Watson said that she and the contest judges noticed “a different tone” in this year’s pieces, with more artists opening up about their personal struggles with mental health.
“In the past a lot of the submissions were focused on awareness,” she said, “but now we’re seeing the [artists] who are experiencing [mental health issues] themselves really expose themselves by sharing their own stories and expressing how they’re feeling.”
The awards ceremony and a series of presentations by guest speakers, which attendees can watch from inside their cars or from their own lawn chairs situated just outside their cars, will begin at 5 p.m. Ten finalists chosen by the judges will be named and will each receive a framed certificate and a $250 cash prize. The audience, including those watching the livestream from home, will then have a chance to vote for their favorite of the 10 finalists to win a People’s Choice Award.
Guest speakers will include mental health awareness advocate and former New Hampshire Chief Justice John Broderick; 10-year-old New Hampshire Kid Governor Charlie Olsen, whose platform is childhood depression; and Dr. Cassie Yackley, a specialist in trauma-informed mental health care, discussing the importance of art in mental health.
The event is often “eye-opening” for the audience, Watson said, as it gives youth an outlet to publicly express thoughts and feelings that they may not have wanted or been able to articulate before.
“Our youth really have a lot to say, and [art] helps them deliver it in a different way,” she said. “Now we just need to listen to them.”
Magnify Voices Expressive Arts Contest Celebration Where: Tupelo Drive-In, 10 A St., Derry, and virtually via livestream When: Thursday, May 20, 4 to 6:30 p.m. More info/register: Visit sites.google.com/view/magnify-voices and facebook.com/magnifyvoicesexpressivearts
Featured photo: Youth art from a previous Magnify Voices Expressive Arts Contest. Courtesy photo.
The latest from NH’s theater, arts and literary communities
The Nashua International Sculpture Symposium returns May 20. Courtesy photo.
• The sculptors are coming: The 14th annual Nashua International Sculpture Symposium will commence on Thursday, May 20, with a private opening reception, which will be recorded for the public to watch online. During the symposium, three renowned sculptors will spend three weeks in Nashua creating three outdoor sculptures for permanent installation in the city. This year’s sculptors, all coming from the U.S., are Gavin Kenyon from New York, Sam Finkelstein from Maine, and Nora Valdez, from Boston, Mass., originally from Argentina. The sculptors will work outside The Picker Artists studios (3 Pine St., Nashua) Monday through Saturday, from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m., from Monday, May 24, through Friday, June 4. They will relocate to the sculpture installation site on Saturday, June 5, where they will continue their work until the closing ceremony on Saturday, June 12.During those times, the public will be able to watch the sculptors work and interact with them during their breaks (masks and social distancing required). The closing ceremony, at which the finished sculptures will be revealed, will take place at the installation site and will also be available to watch online. Visit nashuasculpturesymposium.org.
• NH Jewish Film Festival returns: The New Hampshire Jewish Film Festival returns virtually Wednesday, May 19, through Thursday, June 10, with 11 independent foreign films as well as a series of food-themed shorts. The feature films — all New Hampshire premieres — come from eight countries: the United States, Israel, Ethiopia, Germany, Italy, Norway, Poland and Switzerland. They will be released one at a time on different days, each with a 72-hour watch window, starting with When Hitler Stole Pink Rabbit, a period drama from Germany and Switzerland, on May 19. “Our goal is to bring thought-provoking and enlightening documentaries, fiction films and shorts that you can’t find anywhere else,” festival co-chair Ross Fishbein said in a press release. “We’re delighted to bring some of the world’s best indie films straight to your living room.” Additionally, there will be Q&A events with the filmmakers for five of the films, to be held over Zoom. Tickets are per household and cost $12 per film, $43 for a four-pack film pass and $110 for an all-access pass to all 11 films. The shorts series, which includes five short films, will be free and available to watch at any point during the festival. Visit nhjewishfilmfestival.com.
• A call for Covid poetry: New Hampshire residents are invited to submit original poems for review and possible publication in COVID Spring Vol. II,an anthology of poetry about the pandemic experience in New Hampshire, to be edited by New Hampshire Poet Laureate Alexandria Peary and published by Hobblebush Books this summer. The anthology is a follow-up to COVID Spring: Granite State Pandemic Poems, published in September 2020, which features original poems submitted by more than 50 New Hampshire writers, providing “a thirty-day snapshot of what life was like in the Granite State in April of 2020” through topics such as Covid-related “job loss, loneliness and love, masks, social distancing, surreal visitors, uncertainty, graduations deferred, grief, neighborly and less-than-neighborly acts, observing the beginning of the pandemic and making projections about the future, recalibrating or confirming what it means to be human, to be a resident of this region,” Peary said in the anthology’s introduction. Youth age 18 and under may also submit original poems to be considered for the anthology’s new youth section. Submit a poem or poems (up to three) by Sunday, May 23, through the online submission form at hobblebush.com/anthology-submissions. Poets will be notified of the editor’s decision by June 15.
• Joining together for Portsmouth arts: The All Together Now benefit concert series kicks off Friday, May 14, with singer-songwriter Zachary Williams performing live at The Music Hall (28 Chestnut St., Portsmouth) at 5:30 and 8 p.m. The series is a collaboration between The Music Hall and its fellow Portsmouth arts venues Prescott Park Arts Festival and 3S Artspace to raise funds for the latter two to help them recuperate from the pandemic. The series continues with Rachael & Vilray on Saturday, May 22 (sold out), and Son Little on Friday, June 11, at 5:30 and 8 p.m. Tickets cost $25, $40, and $60. Visit themusichall.org.
Art
Exhibits
• DUO ARTIST EXHIBIT Features oils by Jim Ryan and watercolors by Lorraine Makhoul. On view during May. Seacoast Artist Association, 130 Water St., Exeter. Call 778-8856 or visit seacoastartist.org.
• 35TH ANNUAL OMER T. LASSONDE JURIED EXHIBITION The New Hampshire Art Association presents a group art show featuring works in a variety of media by NHAA members and non-members. NHAA’s Robert Lincoln Levy Gallery (136 State St., Portsmouth). On view now through May 30. Call 431-4230 and visit nhartassociation.org.
• “TRANSFORMATIONS: NATURE AND BEYOND” The New Hampshire Art Association presents works by digital artist William Townsend. Greater Concord Chamber of Commerce Gallery, 49 S. Main St., Concord. On display now through June 17. Gallery hours are Monday through Friday, 8:30 a.m. to 5 p.m. Visit nhartassociation.org or call 431-4230.
• “THE BODY IN ART: FROM THE SPIRITUAL TO THE SENSUAL” Exhibit provides a look at how artists through the ages have used the human body as a means of creative expression. On view now through Sept. 1. Currier Museum of Art, 150 Ash St., Manchester. Museum admission tickets cost $15, $13 for seniors age 65 and up, and must be booked online. Call 669-6144 or visit currier.org.
• “TOMIE DEPAOLA AT THE CURRIER” Exhibition celebrates the illustrator’s life and legacy through a collection of his original drawings. On view now. Currier Museum of Art, 150 Ash St., Manchester. Museum admission tickets cost $15, $13 for seniors age 65 and up, and must be booked online. Call 669-6144 or visit currier.org.
• “RETABLOS RECONSIDERED” Exhibit features works by 12 artists inspired by retablos, the honorific art form of devotional paintings that relate to miraculous events. Twiggs Gallery (254 King St., Boscawen). On view now through June 6. Gallery hours are Thursday through Saturday from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m., and Sunday from noon to 4 p.m. Call 975-0015 or visit twiggsgallery.wordpress.com.
• “GEOMETRIC ABSTRACTION THROUGH CUT AND PASTE” City Arts Nashua and The Nashua Telegraph present an exhibition featuring the works of Meri Goyette, including statement collages and collectible greetings cards that she crafted from paper, fabric and glue during the pandemic. On display in the windows and lobby of the Telegraph offices (110 Main St., Suite 1, Nashua). Now through June 11. Visit cityartsnashua.org.
• “CRITICAL CARTOGRAPHY” Exhibit features immersive large-scale drawings by Larissa Fassler that reflect the Berlin-based artist’s observations of downtown Manchester while she was an artist-in-residence at the Currier Museum in 2019. On view now through fall. Currier Museum of Art, 150 Ash St., Manchester. Museum admission tickets cost $15, $13 for seniors age 65 and up, and must be booked online. Call 669-6144 or visit currier.org.
• GALLERY ART A new collection of art by more than 20 area artists on display now in-person and online. Creative Ventures Gallery (411 Nashua St., Milford). Call 672-2500 or visit creativeventuresfineart.com.
Events
• 14TH ANNUAL NASHUA INTERNATIONAL SCULPTURE SYMPOSIUM Three renowned sculptors will spend three weeks in Nashua creating three outdoor sculptures for permanent installation in the city. The public will be able to watch the sculptors work and interact with them during their breaks (masks and social distancing required). Monday through Saturday, 10 a.m. to 4 p.m., Fri., May 24 through Fri., June 4, outside The Picker Artists studios (3 Pine St., Nashua), and Sat., June 5 through Sat., June 12, at installation site. A private opening reception will be held on Thursday, May 20, and closing ceremony and sculpture reveal on Saturday, June 12, both of which will be recorded for the public to watch online. Visit nashuasculpturesymposium.org.
Theater
Shows
• 42ND STREET Recorded live in London. Virtual screening presented by Capitol Center for the Arts in Concord. Now through May 19. $15 per ticket. Call 225-1111 or visit ccanh.com.
• FUN HOME The Seacoast Repertory Theatre presents. 125 Bow St., Portsmouth. Now through May 28. Visit seacoastrep.org or call 433-4472.
• GODSPELL The Seacoast Repertory Theatre presents. Virtual and in person at 125 Bow St., Portsmouth. Now through May 30. Visit seacoastrep.org or call 433-4472.
• DISCOVERING MAGIC WITH ANDREW PINARD The Hatbox Theatre (Steeplegate Mall, 270 Loudon Road, Concord). Wed., May 19 and June 16, 7:30 p.m. Tickets cost $22 for adults, $19 for members, seniors and students, and $16 for senior members. Call 715-2315 or visit hatboxnh.com.
• A WIDER CIRCLE The New Hampshire Theatre Project’s Elephant-in-the-Room Series, in partnership with the Seacoast Mental Health Center, presents a reading of the play, written by local playwright and social studies teacher Mary Ellen Hedrick. Virtual, via Zoom. Thurs., May 20, 7 to 9 p.m. Free. Registration is required. Visit nhtheatreproject.org.
• QUEEN CITY IMPROV The Hatbox Theatre (Steeplegate Mall, 270 Loudon Road, Concord). Fri., May 21 and June 4, and Thurs., June 17, 7:30 p.m. Tickets $22 for adults, $19 for members, seniors and students, and $16 for senior members. Call 715-2315 or visit hatboxnh.com.
